Hello everybody once again. This is DJ Jake with another update. First of all, if you just came to this website for the first time, go read the news posting for 11/5/02 and up before reading this one because then you'll know what the hell I'm talking about. Okay so let me get right to the point. ICP's 6th Jokers Card album called The Wraith: Shangri-La has completely altered my life. The message is so profound to be that it's damned near impossible to hate as intensely as I once did. The old me is gone. Now there's just the new DJ Jake in the midst of his revelation. Okay, let me make this clear... I detest Eminem and always will. If he isn't the devil himself, he's damned near close. If I was allowed one sin, I'd kill him. He has no positive message in his songs and he's distracting people from the truth. But that's his problem. He has an eternity in Hell's Pit to look forward to. Thanks to ICP and The Wraith, I now have Shangri-La to look forward to. See, one of the many messages in ICP's songs emphasizes the fact that you could die at any time, and when you do, you're either going up, or you're fucked. Since my revelation, fear of hell has kept me in check. And you can believe whatever the fuck you want, but I'm not taking the chance of disbelief and then spending an eternity in hell for it. Now maybe all you mindless Femi-Fans can see how ICP can change and influence the lives of so many people for the better. What's Eminem helping you do? Hate your own mother? You Femi-Fans need to WAKE THE FUCK UP and smell reality. In any event of what you decide, these are the facts I have to offer, and the answers to questions you people want. This website will remain exactly where it is. It's a part of my past and a huge eye-opener to any superficial BrandiBarbieBitch-like idiot. Secondly, the HATE I need to operate this website has subsided, meaning I don't have the slightest inclination to continue bitching at you Femi-Fans to no avail. You wanna go straight to Hell, that's your choice. All I can do is hope you see the light one day. Thirdly, all the shit you people have submitted before I took my contact info offline WILL be posted. That includes hate mail too. And speaking of all you haters, read this: I know all of you are going to be like, "ha ha we made you stop" but the truth is you had nothing to do with it, and now I'm going to Heaven, and you're not. Now who won, bitch? Roll that around in your head. I know you still don't have the mental capacity to figure out exactly what that means, but you should still try. Anyway, I believe operating this website is a one-way ticket to Hell, regardless of how completely awesome and true my intentions are. Because you KNOW I'm right about Eminem. This website already proved EVERYTHING I was saying. There's really no need to expand it further. All the Femi-Haytaz won. We proved what we set out to prove. The evidence is all over this website. And if you want further revelations, listen to the messages provided by ICP. As for this website, I'll still randomly update and tweak shit, but submissions will no longer be accepted and my email will not be listed. I know there's a quarter million hits a year on this website, and you'd all like me to fully continue, but my revelation to Shangri-La thanks to ICP cannot be reversed. And if you had any brain whatsoever, you should learn from my example. MCL to all true Juggalos and Juggalettes!!! DJ Jake

You know what's been going on with me recently if you've been reading my recent postings. How can I continue on with the hate if I'm no longer filled with hate? The fact is, I can't. I'm ABOVE that shit, at least, for this moment. Thanks to The Wraith, with extra support from my girlfriend, (whose name I'll never mention here because I know you idiots will abuse that information), I've had some severe revelations recently. So let me drop some bombs... "DieKill" has ceased production for now. The meaning of the album is in question because of my modified views. And I know I've been working towards it since 2000, but the ultimate goal of the album isn't what it used to be. The content of my songs henceforth *probably* will be severely different. And I'll write them when I feel like writing them (as usual), not when it's expected of me. Now for the big question... what about Feminem.com? The website will not die. It will remain exactly where it is. It's a part of my past, and I can't trash my past. The thing is... I'm not as hateful as I was before The Wraith... and it's hard to operate a hate website when you're a nicer person. It's funny... now all my enemies are going to be like, "ha ha we made you stop" but the truth is, is that I'm going to Heaven, and you're not. Now who won, bitch? Roll that around in your head. At this point... None of that shit matters to me. Eternal paradise is what I'm looking forward to. And I'll see all you down Juggalos and Juggalettes there. My revelation is still in progress... so I'll have to think some more about this. MCL, DJ Jake

Could this week get any better? I mean holy God this week is endless amounts of wonderfulness! Okay... anyway, the Insane Clown Posse was in Phoenix last night at an in-store appearance... and I just got back from it and am writing this. Let's see... where to start? I came down with a cold today... fucking viruses, but it didn't stop me from having an awesome day. I went to the ICP appearance anyway... just to simply tell them how awesome The Wraith is and how it's changed me around. So anyway, I get there kinda late... they just ran out of those blue wrist-bands they were putting on people to get into ICP's Truck-trailer box thing... whatever the fuck it's called. And I'm like fuck no! ICP will not let all these extra Juggalos get the shaft, so I stayed, and then a Juggalo I know from my college came up to me and let me cut in his line, mad props yo! Anyway that shit doesn't matter... I'd say there were like 500 Juggalos/ettes at this thing, and we waited in a really fuckin' disorganized line. Never underestimate how many Juggalos are going to show up, they (the record store) really need to learn that lesson. Anyway, at like 10PM they tell us that to get everyone in, ICP has to stop signing shit... up to that time it was like every 5 minutes 5 more people were let in. Then they let like 5 people in every minute. So I got in around 10:20PM... It's not what you'd expect was in it... Steps and shit and then those foam padded things that were in your way, and then finally the wonderful ocean of Faygo bottles that I dove into... and ripped my jeans damnit, but it's all good. You'll see this shit for yourself if you go, because ICP's going to plenty of these appearances. Anyway, I finally get up to Shaggy and J and they're signing autographs anyway, no matter what the fuckin' security people said. So I get up there and say something along the lines of, "I just can't express how awesome The Wraith is... like 5 minutes into track 17 I was near-tears... You've changed me from heading towards Hell's Pit to Shangri-La, and I can't thank you enough. I'll see you both in Shangri-La." And I didn't want to hold up any other Juggalos or anything, and they weren't letting people talk too long anyway, so I shook their hands & that was it... and outside some Psychopathic guy was giving out free 4-track Wraith Samplers to top it all off. And the blue wrist band didn't matter worth a shit. So anyway, that was that. Just thought I'd randomly let you people know what was going on. I feel sorry for all the people who haven't heard of ICP until now. The mystery of the message is no longer a mystery, but those who have been down for years upon years, like me, hearing The Wraith was the most satisfying thing ever.

Oh yeah, speaking of The Wraith... there's an implied Eminem diss on that CD! The faggot-ass name "Eminem" was never mentioned, but it was implied in the song called, "Soopa Villians". Violent J said, "I love Batman, but Robin's a faggot!" Straight up. Fuck Eminem and his lack of message in his songs. ICP's rapping about the most important thing in life. It's not about money or bitches or drugs or being happy... it's about eternal paradise in Shangri-La. MCL, DJ Jake

I'm urging all of you to NOT view Feminem's bullshit "Ate Man" movie. Don't you understand? He's trying to make money off of your sorry ass! He already has enough money. If you buy a ticket, you're paying that butt-sucker to influence you with his gay-ass shit even more. I bet there's subliminal pictures of him sucking his own dick in this movie. Do you really want to see that shit? Fuck no! If you just can't resist the urge to see "Gay Mile", my advice is this... wait a couple of weeks. And I'll tell you why... There's an easy way to view this movie without ever paying a damn penny. In the first weeks of its release, someone is going to smuggle in a video camera and record "Gay Male". Either that or they'll somehow get their hands on an illegal copy. The person who does this will then compress the video file on his computer and make it available for download through the file-sharing program Kazaa.com. If you never heard of Kazaa.com, then go there now and use it to share your shit. In any case, after this movie has been out for a while, it will be freely downloadable. Get it then. Actually, I already checked on Kazaa.com, and the movie is ALREADY available for download. So don't give that cockmaster any more funds and download the shit if you MUST see his movie. Don't even let someone else pay for your movie ticket... you're still indirectly paying Feminem's ass. It's not like I'm telling you, "Hey you need to illegally download this shit"... I'm just telling you the facts of life and the wonderful world of compressed video. It's your choice to take advantage of this world or not. Eminem can eat a dick if he's got a problem with people constantly downloading his shit, because it's NEVER going to stop! Anyway, let me drop a little line in again about the 6th Joker's Card by ICP called "The Wraith - Shangri-La"... I have a LOT more to say... I just can't express how much I think it's the best album I've ever heard in my entire life. But let me also tell you that you should BUY a copy, because the CD is meant to be played from track 1 to track 17 in order, and not downloaded and randomly listened to. The full impact of the message can be heard that way. I'll have more about the album again later. MCL, DJ Jake

For those of you who know or care, I attended the CD Release party hosted by Alex Abbiss in Phoenix, Arizona. It was the fresh shit! It would have been more of the shit if I was 21 fucking years old, which I will be on November 6th, tomorrow, fucking damn it. Alex was all, "Hey bartender, give all these mother fuckers free drinks on Psychopathic!!!" And he did that shit like 4 times... and I'm like FUCK I wish I had a fake license. I don't know why I never made one... I'm an expert counterfeiter. Anyway, I didn't get to drink shit. Also, to that one Juggalette that was all over me & wanted me to come with you after the event... sorry, but my loyalties run deep to my girlfriend. Hope you understand, I didn't mean to piss you off, if you were upset anyway. Anyway, props to the Wicked kid or whatever the hell your name was for winning the karaoke contest, and props to that hot girl with tits for winning that wet T-shirt contest. And then MAD mother fucking props to Alex Abbiss because he announced something that was a MAD fresh possibility... On November 5th, Alex is going to talk to Phoenix's Convention Center to see if we can have the next Gathering of the Juggalos out here in PHOENIX Arizona! Holy fuckin' balls that was sweet information to know. Anyway, I've got my copies of the 6th Jokers Card, and I'm gonna pop that shit in right now and immerse myself in the wonderful world of Shangri-La. MCL, DJ Jake

This is being written in the moment of inspiration upon listening to The Wraith.
Most of my life I never believed in God. I believed in science & the theory of evolution. I'm just too smart for my own good. Stupid people have an easier time believing in God because they don't question the whole Faith thing as much as an intelligent person does. I would need proof... until one day I realized that there's no conclusive proof either way. It was then that I accepted the possibility of there being an All Mighty being. That was around 3 years ago. It's interesting... I knew what ICP's message was... deep down, and with the Wraith's confirmation of that message... it's like... what the fuck am I doing? My current lifestyle is a one-way ticket to Hell. Oh yeah, I'm a kool kick ass nice person in person, but that doesn't make someone Heaven-bound. I don't know what I'm trying to say... first let me take back my continued disses towards towel-heads... not all of you are evil bastards. Sorry if I pissed you (good) Muslims off. But fuck the Al-Qaeda & all you terrorist bastards... I don't give a shit, if you kill innocent people you need to die. Moving along, you male homosexuals... I will never agree with your sick-ass lifestyle. If you want to butt-fuck your neighbor and cum in his ass, that's your gay-ass choice. You get ZERO respect from me from doing that shit. I remember somewhere in the Bible it says "God hates that" and it's referring to homo-sex. So just remember every time you fuck that butthole, you're sinning and losing points with God, making Hell your end result. Gay = Hell for SURE. Straight = Better chance for Heaven... and by staying straight, us people have a better chance to get into Heaven. Moving on to you Femi-Fans. Hmmm... you worship Eminem, who has no particular message in his songs. He raps for money. He thinks everything in the world revolves around money. He may be a rich mother fucker, but he sure as hell ain't pointing anyone in the right direction. All of you Femi-Fans need to realize that in the end you will DIE, it is a certain FACT of life. When you die, you go up, or you go down. Your life is a test to see where you'll end up. Your entire life is designed to test your faith in God. God put so many things out there to distract you from the truth (i.e. Feminem), and it's your responsibility to see past these things and maintain the faith, resulting in a life of eternal bliss. What would you rather have... a fucking awesome sinful life here on Earth, and then an eternity of hell, or a nice & happy life filled with Family & shit and resulting in everlasting paradise? Sure, sinning is as easy as blinking, but you don't get points for doing what's easy. All I'm trying to say is that the 6th has dropped, its message has reached the ears of your one and only DJ Jake, and he is forever changed by that message. I will continue to maintain this website... I don't know what will change really... I'll continue to point out where people are messing up... helping them in my own way. My point is, is that DJ Jake will gradually become Heaven-bound, because I don't even like to think about what Hell's going to be like. You could die at any time, and when you do, it's the sum of all your past and what you are at that exact moment that will determine where you end up. I don't care if you do or don't believe in God... just submit yourself, like I did, to the possibility that there is an all-powerful being, because you sure as hell aren't going to find ANY proof EITHER way until you die. I'd rather be on the Heaven side when I do die, ya know? So anyway, hating will continue on this website, because Feminem is causing people to end up in Hell instead of Heaven... while ICP is helping people on their way to Heaven instead of Hell. You can bitch at me all you want... the truth is, is that this life is a freakin' fraction of what you'll actually be living, so why don't you reconsider your path before emailing me. I don't make the same mistake twice, and ICP's message will forever be engraved in my mind. And if you listen to them, TRULY listen to them, then that message will be with you forever as well.

And it all starts here with Feminem.com. As promised, the updates are complete, and ready for you to view. It'll probably take you like an hour to view everything. First of all, the new month is now officially upon us, as there is a new Faggot of the Month! Say hello to Darren Jacobs, as he has earned the honorary position of Faggot #1 with his fake-ass "lawyer" emails. Speaking of faggots, I heard that Shawn (Shaved Cucumber) dropped out of his high school and is now in some secondary school. Ha ha ha. Damn, we kicked his ass!

There are plenty of new Pictures in the 2nd gallery of this website, including the famous Feminem & Elton John embracement. That's right all you Femi-Fans, that's your hero embracing a gay man! Remember when he said, "I can't wait to catch all you faggots in public, I'ma love it."? He's obviously loving it. And what did he do when he saw Britney and Christina in public? Not a damn thing. He chickened out worse than KFC.

There are 2 new songs in the Other Songs section of this website! They're both very high-quality disses, and I'd recommend them both... even though I don't particularly like Aguilera's music. Anyway, there's a song called, "Bend On Over Shady" by (possibly) Christina Aguilera. I don't know for sure if it's Christina... if you know who it is, then tell me, because I couldn't find accurate information worth a shit. The other song is called "Shady MF" by Natas. That one is awesome as well, so check both of those out.

And there's "Comments" that will take a long-ass time to read that have been added to this website. See what your fellow Femi-Haytaz have to say. Also, for that one person who asked if I get more hate than fan mail, I get more fan mail by a substantial amount. I just don't post every fan mail as a "comment" because no one wants to read "I'm glad to see someone hates Eminem as much as I do. Your website kicks ass!" a hundred times a week on this website. Hate mail is technically an altered form of fan mail, because they continually prove that I'm successfully carrying out my mission of Femi-dissing, and they love/hate me so much that they can't resist emailing me.

Lastly, there are some new Hate Mails, so you'll enjoy that, I'm sure. In the meantime, all you Juggalos make time for the 6th, and try to make it to a CD release party, because I'm going to the one in Phoenix tomorrow. Then I'll be 21 then I'll see ICP on the 7th here in Phoenix again. It's a busy week. Also, BOYCOTT that fucking 8-minute movie with Feminem. Don't even let someone else pay for your ticket. You're putting more money in Feminem's pockets, and he doesn't need any more contributions from stupid-ass people. MCL, DJ Jake

Happy Halloween & Hallowicked everybody! Bless whoever came up with this holiday. I didn't do much... just hung out and lived like a Juggalo. So basically no different than most days. I took a few pictures and posted two of them in the Pictures section for you to check out. Nothing too terribly special... Just DJ Jake on Halloween. Anyway, as for the incompleted sections of this website... "CDs" is making slow progress, but it does have progress, I just haven't uploaded that progress yet. I'll upload it when it's done. There's just ALL KINDS of shit going on this weekend & this coming week, it's not even funny. This weekend I should update the Feminem website... plus I got all kinds of college shit to work on, plus Monday is the ICP CD release party (Appearances), then the 6th Joker's Card finally arrives, then it's my 21st birthday the day after that (same day as my girlfriend's), and then the day after that, ICP will be here in Phoenix. So holy bald nuts! Insanity!!! Bottom line... I'm busy like MAD.

In response to reports that September's Faggot of the Month has been harassing people (and "attempting" to diss me) with the "Shit List" and other addresses, I've just written a very awesome reply to that ass-blasting Kevin Smothers character. This reply can be found in the Hate Mail section. If you've only got limited time to view this website right now, make it a priority to check out that reply first. If you have infinite time, then also be sure to check out some new Pictures and some new "Comments". By the way... whatever happened to all the picture submissions? Ever since the new layout came online, you people haven't been submitting as many pictures... what's with that? That can't be ALL of the Eminem-dissing pictures that are out there. Anyway I have a question, do any of you have a high-quality version of the song "And So Kiddies" by Cage? The best version that was submitted to me was only 96kbps at 44.1kHz, and it really does sound like crap. It's borderline Real Audio quality. So if you have a better version than what I got, then send it to me so I can post it on this website. That's it for now. Be sure to inconvenience Kevin Smothers at KSMOTHERS@nadn.org.

I've been informed by many people that the Master Shit List account recently underwent some heavy bombardment, resulting in approximately 30% of the email addresses to crash. Congratulations on your success. As for you people who have threatened me to remove your name, it's your problem. You submitted "Hate Mail" to me, and by doing so waived all rights to your email address. If you want your email address removed, trash your account. Get a new email address. But I take no responsibility in what happens to the Master Shit List account which contains your submitted email address. If you want to get pissed at somebody, get pissed at yourself, or at whoever is emailing you. And don't email the Master list asking, "can you remove me"? Because you're simply emailing everyone else who is on that shit list. How pathetic.

Anyway, I'm massively behind when it comes to responding to Fan mail. I did update all the Hate Mail though. What a wonderful reply to the 2nd part of the fake-ass lawyer's email! I've been busy working on the new DJJake.com, which I threw online just the other day, but like 90% of the content isn't scripted yet. I was just sick of showing off the old un-updated content. So anyway that's about it. Give me a few more days to reply to your Fan mail. Thanks.

Welcome to the new layout for DJJake.com! I told you it was coming, and I have delivered upon yet another promise. Actually, the website isn't even half done, but all the basic scripting is completed, and I'd rather show off a good-looking website with no content than a bad-looking website with inaccurate information. So anyway, here it is! And I told you those menu buttons were fresh! Check that shit out! If you're using Shitscape... I mean Netscape, close that program and use Internet Explorer, because you can't see JavaScript with their obsolete navigator. Those buttons may be fresh, but there's really no content to look at right now. So if there's blank pages EVERYWHERE, well I haven't scripted them. So just wait for it. I hope to get about 1 section done per day... which would make the entire website done around the 26th of this month. Then and only then, will I consider working on a new song. It's impossible to run 2 websites, deal with college, have a gurlfriend, and live on your own, AND have adequate time to write a song. So anyway, yeah good for me.

The only sections that are complete are DJJake, "Recent News", "Old News", and Contacts. The other pages haven't been scripted, and will remain blank until they are complete. Obviously, since the Buy Stuff section is offline, you can't buy DJ Jake merchandise until it's online. I'll be removing a few out-of-date items anyway, so it's best it's offline for now. Speaking of DJ Jake merchandise, I'm removing "The Really Slim Penis (Single #1)" from this website because it still hasn't sold one damned copy. Fine by me. This just means it's super RARE, and down the road when I'm more well-known, they'll be worth quite a bit! And yes, for those of you who follow the events happening at Feminem.com in the "Hate Mail" section, I removed it because of hearing from that Femi-Fan (he tried to be a lawyer) that the content was copyright-infringing. I was like... hmmm... one day I might actually get contacted by a REAL lawyer, then I actually will have to remove it... So I'll take it off now, before any of the copies sell, so they can't do shit about it anyway. And of course no copies sell because the disc contains Feminem songs... who would wanna buy that SHIT?!? Well okay anyway, welcome to the new website. Hope you enjoy it. Keep coming back, I'll update frequently. MCL, DJ Jake

As the new Feminem.com layout enters it's 9th day, already I've seen massive changes in the functionality of this website. All of these changes have been for the better. First of all, the volume of Hate Mail I receive has basically been cut in half... it appears many of the Femi-Fans are now afraid of my wrath, talent, and overall ruthlessness. Now, of course, all you Femi-Fans that are reading this (if you can read, you illiterate fucks) you're going to prove me wrong by submitting more hate mail. That's fine by me... I mentioned this because I WANT more hate mail. I'm always down for a good laugh. And you're only helping this website grow by submitting that shit to me. Another thing that's changed... the volume of fan mail has doubled, so expect slower replies from me. That's life.

I've also been contacted by Dasit's producer. Dasit created the Eminem-diss song called "Hater" which is currently hosted in the Other Songs section. I'm pleased to announce that there's a better-compressed Mp3 of that song now hosted at 96kbps instead of 64kpbs, so re-download it because it's easily one of the better Eminem diss songs. Also, Dasit's producer mentioned to me that they plan on shooting a video for the "Hater" song 3 weeks from now. I'll let you know more when he lets me know more.

Also, yes, those damned "Song Lyrics". I won't bullshit you, I haven't even touched that shit. Song lyrics are my least favorite thing in the world to HTML-script. I worked on some other DJ Jake projects instead of that shit this whole week. Obviously I still plan on completing those sections... but I really hate scripting that shit. I'll do it when I do it. You can help me out by NOT submitting any new song lyrics until the sections are working again.

Now, to the updates! I put up plenty of new Hate Mails last night, including the 10th goddamned reply to Brandi. I swear, getting through to her is like talking to a brick wall. Also, Shawn, the Faggot of the Month hasn't contacted me in almost 2 weeks. I think I scared the fuckin' piss out of him. There's also some new "Comments" and a new Picture. Lastly, for those of you who have asked & commented, I DO plan on producing Feminem.com T-Shirts at some point. They will bear the Feminem logo on the front for sure... as for details, I actually really can't reveal anything yet because the plans are too sketchy. But I'll let you know more when I know more. I hope to have them ready in time for Christmas. We'll see. MCL, DJ Jake

I have a few things I'd like to mention as October gets to it's 1st week's end. Feminem.com is the shit with the new layout. Thank you for your compliments on it's new design. I'm happier with it online, and am happy that I pleased you fans of the website with it. Secondly... this current design for DJJake.com is CRAP... and I'd appreciate that you don't even look at it until I've updated it with it's new layout. Henceforth, I will only be posting new news in this section using this current crappy layout... all the other pages will NOT be updated with new information until it's reformatted with the new layout. Thirdly... the new layout for this site is making slow but steady progress... I love the new menu buttons. I plan on putting up the *basic* layout within a few weeks. I'm really eager to redo this website... even if it means sacrificing updating Feminem.com for a while. Fourthly, there's something DJ Jake-related that I can't tell you about yet... but I will mention it at a later date... and lastly, I am officially mentioning that the song "The Really Slim Penis" will NOT be appearing on my upcoming LP album, "DieKill". I have plans to create a new and even more fresh Eminem dissing song that will blow the shits out of all Femi-Fans. I may have said in the past that I wouldn't waste my time creating an instrumental for an Eminem dissing song, and that's why I used Feminem's for the song "The Really Slim Penis"... but in this case it's different. I'm not making this for Eminem to hear. And I'm not wasting my time. I'm doing it for me, for the Femi-Haytaz, and to piss off the Femi-Fans, and possibly make them understand the truth. The release date for this song is unknown, but it will be the 1st official release from "DieKill". Good things are coming. Some are already here. More updates soon!

This month's Faggot of the Month decided not to show up to the fight that was arranged between him and a Juggalo named Jeff yesterday. The fight was to be happening on Friday afternoon sometime, and while Jeff and some other Juggalos were there waiting for the faggot known as Shawn Newcomer (Shaved Cucumber) to show up, it ended in disappointment when the Femi-Fan didn't show up because of a severe butt-plugging accident. Reports are unconfirmed, but seem to indicate that Shawn was at his home just before the fight was about to take place. He was watching American Pie 2, and decided to try what Jason Biggs did with the super-glue. Shawn then super-glued his right hand to his dick, and his other hand to his nutsack. Shawn realized he messed up, and attempted to leave his bedroom, but found out that his door was closed, and he had no way of opening it. Shawn then let his pants fall off, and decided to grab onto the door handle with his buttcheeks. Just as he was attempting to grab the door handle, his mom burst into his room, shoving the door handle deep inside his butthole. Shawn now remains in the hospital in Gay, but stable condition.

Aside from that shit, there's also something amusing that's been happening since this new layout has dropped. Everyone now knows that the "Shit List" has a new "Master Shit List" address, which forwards to every Femi-Fan on that list. To see what people would be doing to this account, I had that master account forward to my own account. Now get this... Aside from all that other shit, I got 2 emails from different Femi-Fans that thought the "Shit List" was a list of people who HATE Eminem! How fuckin' stupid can you get?!? And all you people on the Shit List know what I'm talking about because you got those emails too! Ha ha ha! Fuckin' retards. Anyway... there's a new Hate Mail from Brandi *rolls eyes*. And plenty new "Comments". Check that shit, and tell Shawn how much of a pussy he is for not showing up. MCL, DJ Jake

The day you've been waiting for has arrived! Welcome to the brand new and 100% more fresh Feminem.com and Slimanus.com layout! There are SO many improvements that have now been made to this website. I'll be talking about all of these improvements in this news posting. So before you go off exploring, read about what's changed. First of all, the logo for this website was redone, so check it out Here. That's the shit. Let me also say that EVERY page of this website has been upgraded, and it's not just the appearance that's changed... the content and actual organizational structure has changed as well. The "Who's Feminem" section has been massively upgraded with detailed information and FACTS about Feminem. The Who Made This Site section contains a lot more detailed information about me, why I hate Eminem, and my comments about shit in general. One of my favorite improvements is in the FAQ section. Now I don't have to answer the same old shit over and over, you can just hit up that section and probably find an answer to your question, because there's PLENTY of new answers for you all.

As for the news sections, the content is basically the same, it's not like I can change the past. So everything that's happened in the near 400-day operation of this website is still listed there. As for the diss sections... there's plenty of upgrades. First of all, let me say that EVERY SINGLE DISS on this website is now being self-hosted by ME, DJ Jake. You don't have to worry about having to go to Mp3.com to hear a song, you don't have to go to Newgrounds.com to watch the animations, you don't have to go to Realjuggalos.com and try to find the Howard Stern interviews anymore. Every diss on this website is now hosted by ME, and there is no need for outside linking. Also, EVERY SINGLE DISS is online at this very moment! If there was ever a song you couldn't download, try it now, it will work. If you couldn't download a song because it was on Mp3.com, don't worry about it, I'M hosting it now, so go get that shit. If there was ever an animation you couldn't see, try it again, it will work now. If you wanted those Howard Stern interviews, but they were offline, now they're ONLINE. If you wanted to play those games in the "Other Disses" section, now you can play them directly through this website. I just want to make it perfectly clear that if there was ever ANYTHING on this website that you couldn't download, it should be working now, so go check it out!

The ICP's Songs section is 100% online, and even has a new Mp3 for you to download! That Mp3 is the Live Howard Stern version when ICP first played the Juggalo Show Version of "Slim Anus" on the radio. So check that shit out. The Other Songs section is now clearly divided into the "Professional" and "Amateur" sections, and all those Mp3s are online, so check them out. Also, the FULL VERSION of the song "Dear Slim" by Miilkbone is finally listed on this website, thank you MiZtaH BoNeZ! Next, the "Song Lyrics" section of this website is the only section that's still under construction at this point. ICP's lyrics are 100% done, including 3 freshly written lyrics from the Live versions of the Howard Stern "Slim Anus" plays. But the other performed & non-performed lyrics are not done yet. Just a few days more, and they'll be running. The Pictures section is more organized now, and now contains 96 pictures in each gallery. The "Shit List" has seen one major improvement... a new email address has been listed that forwards to EVERY email address that is currently in the shit list. So when you send to that email address, it sends to ALL members of the shit list. I did this because the list is growing BIG, and it's impossible to bother them each individually anymore. So now you can bother them all in one simple shot. If you sign that address up for some SPAM emails, ALL of those mother fuckers on the list will get that email. Enjoy! The Hate Mail section has now been divided into months, and is no longer a big list of emails. Be sure to use the top navigation buttons on this website, because there's a LOT of sections that now have that feature. The Faggot of the Month section has been updated in much the same way. There's a new faggot tomorrow! Can you guess who it is? The "Comments" section is now it's own category, and it is organized the same way the hate mail section is. Much cleaner. The "Other Disses" section now contains 4 different sub-sections, Animations, Articles, Games, and Interviews. Obviously, Articles and Games are the new independent sections. Everything works in those sections, so check them out.

As for the Buy Stuff section, the old Slim Anus poster has been removed, and replaced with 2 brand new and 100% more fresh posters! Check those out! The "Submit Your Diss" section now has a lot more details concerning your submission to this website. Please follow the directions from now on, it's not hard. If you follow the simple directions, you'll get a quicker posting by me. The Links section now is divided into two different sub-sections. First, it's a typical linking section to other fresh websites. The new section is called "Banners", and contains all kinds of sizes of Feminem.com and Slimanus.com banners that you can take from this website and use on your site to link back to this website! There's also a small assortment of AIM icons that are available for download in that section. Definitely check that out! And finally, the Contacts section has been modified, but the disclaimer is basically the same. Somehow, you Femi-Fans are still stupid enough to email me though. So that's it! This website has finally grown out of it's amateur stage, and is now slightly-professional! Also, I won't bullshit you, this new version just went online, so there probably are a few bugs left to work out, so if you do see something that's not working, or some kind of mislink or mistype, let me know. Just be sure that it's actually an error before telling me about it. Try reloading the page before telling me about it. 99% of the mess-ups happen because of the browser you're using. So anyway, THERE YOU GO!!! I told you that it was worth the wait, and this new fresh version is FINALLY UP IN THIS BITCH! FUCK EMINEM! WELCOME TO THE NEW FEMINEM.COM! HAVE FUN! MCL! DJ Jake

The new design and content for my other website Feminem.com has finally been uploaded! As promised, September 30th is the premiere date of the new Feminem.com layout. So once you're done reading this, get your ass over to the other website, because there's nothing new here. There's nothing new here because I've been busting my ass trying to get the new Feminem.com online before it was too late. I'm satisfied with what I produced. I got approximately 95% of the website completed... just those damned song lyrics I haven't completed yet. Song lyrics are my least favorite thing to script. Also, the website is now officially on a NEW server! Hopefully this one will see better results than the last unpredictable one. Anyway, everything else is online, with MASSIVE improvements when it comes to organization and detailed content. I won't talk about all the details here, just head over to the other website, because I have a HUGE description of what's changed. So anyway, *whew* at least that's finally off my chest, damn. That thing's been stressing me out like none other. So now I'm almost done with it. Once finished, I'll turn my attention towards touching up this website with a new layout. The only difference will be this: Instead of SUDDENLY the website is updated, it will be a gradual change. Something will be re-scripted everyday, or whenever I get around to doing it. So until the new shit is 100% done, a LOT of the pages on this website will be funky... like half good-looking and half old-shit looking. But that's life. I'm just sick of being embarrassed to show my websites to people... because I didn't think they looked good anymore. Now I'm proud of Feminem.com again. Check that shit. Come back here... later. Yeah so anyway, as you can already see from this news posting, I'm already starting to re-script some of DJJake.com. Once all this shit is finally DONE, I'll be happy as fuck, and finally I can work on new "DieKill" songs. It's about time! And lastly... for any of you girls reading this... DJ Jake now has a girlfriend, so don't bother asking anymore. I know the rest of the website hasn't been updated with that information yet, but trust me, I'm taken. MCL, DJ Jake

As many of you know, the new layout for Feminem.com will be arriving on September 30th... just a few days away! This posting is to let you know that if you're reading this, then everything you submit henceforth will not be posted until the new layout drops. The good shit is finally here. Also, I've located a new server for the website, so the next few days it should be properly transferred over, with the typical and unexpected downtime. That's life. But hopefully the new server will be a helluva lot more stable than the old shit that crashed every other week. Once the transfer is complete, I'll have the adequate hosting space to host all the Mp3s of songs once again. Thanks for your patience.

As for updates... there's a few to mention. There's 3 new Hate Mails to read and laugh at. A typical assortment of email addresses have been added to the "Shit List", and a new "Song Lyric" and a few "Comments" have been posted. That should be it until the new layout drops. I must say, this current version of the website is amateur-istic. The new layout is at least semi-professional. Be sure to come back on the 30th. MCL, DJ Jake

The updates are here! Eminem gets dissed more, but his Femi-Fans receive yet another beat-down from DJ Jake. Eight, yes EIGHT new Hate Mails have been added and replied to. So if you're in the mood to read the stupidity of typical Eminem fans, check them out. There's also some new Pictures in the 2nd gallery. New "Song Lyrics" have also been added. There would be more song lyrics, but I had to reject a few submissions because the lyrics were either too short, or weren't proofread before submission. So correct them and get them back to me so I can post that shit. There's also a few new "Comments". Check it all out, especially the hate mail.

As for the war with "Pharmicuiticals", DJ Jake and all fans of this website have the upper hand. I would like to make something clear though... I hear that Shawn (Pharmicuiticals) is telling people the he did not write those emails, or didn't say what he said in the AIM conversations. Shawn, the faggot, is lying. I can personally forward each and every hate mail that has been sent to me. I can also personally send the HTM of the AIM conversation I had with that bitchass faggot. He is ashamed of what he's already said, so now he's trying to cover up his past actions by denying that they ever took place! Only a Femi-Fan would believe that I make up those hate mails anyway. The hate mail you see on this website is as stupid as Femi-Fans truly are.

For those of you who have been following the Hate Mail activity in the past recent week, you've known that a fake-ass bitch named Shawn with email address of Pharmicuiticals@aol.com "declared war" on my website. I assured him this was a bad idea, and now he's beginning to believe it. His most recent hate mail clearly mentions his inability to put up with our hating on his account. My advice, keep it up until his account is disregarded! Take his email and sign it up with various SPAM newsletters of all kinds, or just flood his email account with emails, or better yet, pester him on AIM, his screenname is "Pharmicuiticals". This Shawn faggot picked the wrong fight. The Femi-Haytaz allied with this website will back me up all the way. You're going down, Shawn. One more piece of advice about him, he has admitted to only having a DIAL-UP internet connection, so send him some big-ass files so it'll take him hours to download that shit. Lastly, comments from a "Jeff" mentioned this information which will be useful in Pharmicuiticals's destruction:

Yo this is for everyone who has read "Shawn the MSG gang members" E-mails. Him and his friend Brett go to my school. They are nothing but little Sophomore faggots who sit at a table by themselves and have 3 friends. Shawn is like 5'9 and 130 lbs, he plays on my football team. He's a 3rd string wide receiver. I would beat the ever-living shit out of him in the name of all Juggalos, but I can't until football season's over cuz I'll get booted off the team. Plus I'm 18 and he's 16, but me and all the Juggalos hid his clothes in the girls locker room lmao! I read that he says all the Juggalos that go to my school get made fun of, HA HA HA, him and his 2 butt buddies get picked on hardcore because I go to 99% white school and they act like hardcore street thugs, he even calls everyone "niggas". He wears the same Fubu shirt to school each day and gets called "redneck newcomer" cuz he dresses black and talks like a fuckin' hillbilly. He tries his hardest to dress like Fem, he has hair dyed like Fem's and everything. But he will get what comes to him if we ever see him out we all talk mad shit to him, he has a 3-man gang and they are pussies. You'll always see him sitting on the wall with his fuck buddy Brett with their awesome white bandannas on waiting for the school bus to pick them up. MSG stands for "Mink Shoals Gang" the town itself maybe has 200 people living in it, and they go around and spray paint signs and deface a grade-school writing "MsG" Yes they are hardcore gang members often seen cruising on their 20" rims... of the mongoose bikes that they ruthlessly terrorize people on. Yes, these boys are so skinny and pathetic they can be scary. This just in: AIM conversation between DJ Jake and Pharmicuiticals, check out the "Comments".

In other news, this website has been updated with all the new shit once again, and as I mentioned in the last posting, I'm taking a break so I can get something done this weekend that doesn't concern the website. I've taken the Contacts section and the "Submit Your Diss" section offline until *sometime* on Tuesday, September 17th. And don't bother writing to the old email addresses I've been using, because I've already taken those offline for now. As for the new shit, one Picture, 4 new Hate Mails, 2 new "Song Lyrics", new names on the "Shit List", and finally 3 more "Comments". Be sure to check out the comments by Jeff that mention the song where Dre says, "Suck it Marshall". I'm not fucking kidding either. I've posted a short clip of that song so all of you can hear Dr. Dre say to Eminem, "Suck it Marshall." So head over to the "Comments" section to hear it. MCL, DJ Jake

Plenty of disses have been added today. Check out the sections of Pictures, Hate Mail, "Song Lyrics", "Interviews", "Comments", and the "Shit List" for the new updates. But first, read the rest of this message. "Pictures" has like 5 new pictures in the 2nd gallery. "Hate Mail" has like 5 new messages from stupid ass Femi-Fans. "Song Lyrics" has 3 new unsung lyrics. There's new email addresses for you to abuse on the "Shit List". There's a new "Interview", and also some new "Comments" you should read over. So check all that shit out. If I didn't post something you submitted, tough shit. I don't have to post everything, you know.

This second paragraph concerns my coming "breaks" from this website. It's a known fact that my major album and first LP entitled "DieKill" will be released sometime in 2003, but in order for me to have proper amounts of time to work on it, I must postpone working on this website from time to time. Therefore, from now on, once a month (probably no more than that), there will be a period of time (a few days to perhaps a week) where I DO NOT list the Contacts section and the "Submit Your Diss" section, so you cannot contact me while I'm working on new DieKill shit. When I'm on this "break" from the website, no email address will be listed for you to write to, and don't bother writing to any previous email addresses that were listed before, because they will have been disabled. I'll simply take a break to get shit done... whatever kind of "break" that is. And to let you know, this coming weekend, I'll be on "break"... however it won't be to work on DieKill stuff, it's a different reason that you shouldn't give two shits about, so there's no need for me to tell you. So just keep that shit in mind for now.

Moving on, I'm just dropping a note about 9/11. When the 1-year anniversary comes around, take some time to respect all the victims & shit... this goes for all you Femi-Haytaz AND Femi-Fans. Yes, I hate all you Femi-Fans, but you should still show some respect to what happened. Don't send me hate mail on 9/11 because that's just MAD fucked up if you do. If you want to take out your aggression, then go find some damned ragtop and beat his ass down. Beat up that one faggot that dressed up like Osama in that stupid ass "Without Me" video.

(Original post from Feminem.com)You probably didn't notice, but I did. This website was offline for at least an hour once again. Not my fault. I'm infallible. It's other people in this world that fuck things up. That's also why I don't trust anyone. Any-fuckin-way, I am officially parting with the website-hosting service that I have been using for the past month and a half. Supposedly, now the entire website of Slimanus.com and Feminem.com is back to a free server, but I intend to change that before the month is over. There are some big changes that you need to keep in mind now. First off, when you come to this website using Slimanus.com, you'll see that damned splashpage once again, where you have to click the picture to open a pop-up screen to enter the website. Deal with it. That's fuckin' life... just maximize the window that pops up, cuz that's the website. Feminem.com doesn't do that, long story. Anyway, the other change you should keep in mind is that MANY of the songs and interviews & whatever other big files will NOT be downloadable starting today. Since I've parted with their bullshit, I don't currently have the space to host those files. I will when I find another server. But I'm not going to fuckin' keep using a server that crashes 3 times a month. Fuck that shit. It's fuckin' sad when a free hosting place is more reliable than a fuckin' paid-for server. Whoever's in charge of what I used can straight up eat a dick. And I don't give a fuck if they say some shit like this in reply to my email, (They actually did say this): "We have had unnormally many problems with the server you are on the last month, so we will investigate further to see what needs to be done to prevent downtime again. We have servers that have been up and running 100% for a year now, so it very strange that this happens with the server you are on. But rest assured, this has top priority." I don't give a shit. 3 strikes and you're out bitch.

I just randomly updated some more Hate Mail and Pictures and "Comments". As for the hate mail section, there's 4 new emails, including number 7 in the long line of BrandiBarbiGirl replies. My reply to her most recent email pretty much sums up everything. She has come a long way though, if you compare her responses with her 1st email ever... ha ha. There's also 3 other stupid Femi-Fans that needed some beat-down replies, so check those out. You'll definitely get a kick out of them. It's good to see that this website is fulfilling it's purpose in more than one way. And it continually grows in popularity, it'll be interesting to see where it's at come the next Gathering. Proving that Eminem is a fake-ass mainstream sell-out faggot who cares nothing for his fans is not the focus of this website, all of that has already been proven. All the Femi-Fans (Brown Mushrooms) just don't realize that this has already been proven, and they need to either be set in the proper direction, or put in their place. So if you happen to know a Femi-Fan, or just see one around (they're as common fire-hydrants), try to explain to them that they truly need to reconsider the reasons they have for liking Eminem. Most Femi-Fans will say something like, "Oh he's hot!" or "he's popular and rich!" Explain to them that there's more in this world than the superficial bullshit of appearance, popularity and money. And if they still don't understand, then you can beat 'em down. Or you can just beat them down before talking to them, it was their fault for liking that fake-ass bitch in the first place. Anyway, on a final note, I'm busy this week, so if you were going to submit something, I'd appreciate it if you could hold off on submitting it till the weekend. Thanks. MCL, DJ Jake

First thing's first. I'm tired of being "nicer" on this website than my other Eminem-bashing website found at Slimanus.com. I've been limiting what I say on this website, (i.e. using the word "fuck"), but in my mind, I should be saying EXACTLY what I'm thinking, and not toning it down for the more easily-offended viewers. If you're offended by the word fuck, leave. But I'm also pissed right now, and when I'm angry, evil words will be spit. So from now on, every posting on this website will be verbatim of what's in my head.

Moving along, many people have asked what the hell is going on with DKlan? To answer this question, I need to talk about each of the listed members, one by one. First let me say that DKlan still exists, it's a fan base, and if you're down with me, you're a part of DKlan. At some point I might change the name, but at this point, if you're down, you're in DKlan. The members that were listed on this website have been removed, each for their own separate reasons, and I'll now touch upon why they've been removed.

First, let's talk about the good shit, Supah Snickahz. Snix, we've been down for a long ass time... something like 7 or 8 years, right? I know you're down with my shit, you've been down since day 1, even when 103.3 The Butt was still being produced. I appreciate all your support & all that. You're the only listed member of DKlan that I have no problem with. You're down with ICP, as much, and perhaps even more than Phat Knutz is. The new qualification I was going to make for DKlan was that you had to be down with Psychopathic, but that idea hit the trash instantly, because I know I have many fans that don't like ICP or Psychopathic. Anyway, I'm just saying that I appreciate that you're down with Psychopathic, whether or not you're a Juggalo, I don't know. But our problem is that we never talk anymore, and I'm never on AIM anymore, so I never hear from you. What the hell, you know? Of anyone previously listed in DKlan, you're the one I would like to have more contact with... but who the hell knows what's gonna happen now. I just know you wouldn't back-stab me like Wepeel would. So when you read this, kick me up an email.

Moving down the list, Phat Knutz. Yes, we're down. We've been down. We had some problems at the Gathering, but I know why we had problems now. You're not actually a Juggalo. You and I both know it. What the fuck was up with just sitting in the hotel room every night and not conversing with your fellow Juggalos? Shit man, I treasured every second with the Family up in Peoria! I know you're not a Juffalo, you definitely are down with ICP & Blaze & the rest of Psychopathic, but you just don't show the clown love like a true Juggalo should. So, in my mind, that makes you down with Psychopathic, but not a Juggalo. But don't worry, we're still on good terms. I don't expect you to change based on what I'm saying here, actually I don't want you to. It's your decision to be down or not. You know I'm down. I'm so fuckin' down with Psychopathic that nothing, not even 17 billion bucks could change that. Anyway, on one final note... I know you work somewhere where you have to put up with a lot of shit, but you really need to stop putting up with their shit. Don't work extra time with no pay, fuck that shit! Straight up tell them to suck your dick if they want you to work bullshit hours! There's mad amounts of other jobs that are hundreds of times better than that!

On to our third, Sakura. You and I left with no hard feelings. I straight up told you that we can't be down anymore because of your friends. Your friends hate me. They've always hated me, and anything I interact with you about, they have the potential to mess up. So I simply can't be down with you anymore. I'm not saying change your friends, I just know there's nothing I can do to keep them from hating me. Take that one faggot, Jordan Stephens for example. That guy must've butt-fucked Billy Gupton more than once to come bitching at me about my song "Bitch Nuts". Anyway, in my book, you're a fuckin' awesome person to know, and we've been through some serious shit together, and we'll always be at least allies. Damn, we've been though some crazy shit... remember community service back in High School? They thought it was going to be a punishment! 50 hours turned into 30... and remember that one time we were picking up trash outside, and you found a dead pigeon, stiff as a board?... and then you picked it up by it's foot and kicked it over somebody's wall? HA HA HA HA HA! Oh man, those kind of memories I'll have for the rest of my life. Thank you. See you *around*

Lastly, Wepeel. Ah yes, Wepeel. I think I can officially say that you've almost caused me as much anger as my two prior girlfriends. We might have been friends for the past 9 years, but that doesn't matter worth a shit when you don't try anymore. I have BOOTED you out of DKlan. You're never down anymore. You're gonna talk shit behind my back? Well here's a big FUCK YOU! Don't you see? Having you in my life brings me no joy, and I could truly care less if we were "friends" or not anymore. I feel like that "Kevin" guy in American Pie 2... he wants everything to stay the same after High School, but everything keeps changing and falling apart, except in this case, my friends like you have changed to the point of ultimate apathy when it comes to being loyal & down that you're more of a hindrance upon my abilities to get things done than anything else. And don't worry, this isn't one of those bullshit Mid-School or High-School petty fights & we come to an understanding a few weeks later. I am officially disassociating myself from your person, from now until the end of time. Don't even try crawling back to me claiming that you changed & still want to be down. Your chance has passed, and you weren't even paying attention.

That covers the 4 listed members of DKlan. As you can see, only Phat Knuts and Supah Snickahz have the potential to be posted on this website anymore, however, I'm still leaving them off until the new layout for this website drops. Yes, that's right! I will be producing a new layout for DJJake.com! When the new layout for Slimanus.com drops in a few weeks, then I'll begin work on redoing this website, so it's as good as the other one. There's just so much shit that needs to be fixed, including answers to FAQs that I'm SO SICK of answering over and over. I imagine the new layout for this website will be completed just in time for Halloween. When Halloween drops, crazy shit starts happening. The 6th comes out, the CD release party happens, me & a certain girl's birthday happens, and new DieKill songs will finally be started. So if you read that correctly, you'll know the bad news... STILL no new music until at least late October. But that really shouldn't matter to you, because I'm not going to release any more songs (maybe one) until DieKill drops in 2003... late 2003. My first priorities are to get the websites running at 100% capacity with new layouts, then I'll focus on making new music, which also means that the websites will see less updates, but that's life. I'd rather make new music then work on the websites, but I also like to please my fans too... unlike Feminem, who doesn't give 2 shits about his "fans".

On a final note, I forgot to mention this... I took off the songs "Humpty Bump" and "That's What They're For (Hillbilly Bitch Mix)" from Mp3.com. I figure it's not a great idea to have free downloads for everyone. I really want you to purchase "Agitated" cuz it's just so awesome, you need a digitally-mastered copy, not a crappy 128 Mp3. But anyway, I haven't updated the pages that concern the Mp3.com songs, and I don't intend to either, not until the new layout drops. So if there's a broken link, well that's life. That basically covers it for now. That's probably WAY more information than you needed to know, but at least you know what the hell is going on with DJ Jake now, and for the next few months. Oh yeah, hey ROLLER, hit me up an email if you read this. MCL, DJ Jake

All of that shit that you've been waiting to see in the last 8 or 9 days has finally been added to this website. First of all, I just wanted to say congratulations to Twiztid for winning the music video award for "Without Me". Yes, that's right, TWIZTID won that shit, because Eminem STOLE the whole Batman & Robin thing from Twiztid! So fuck Eminem for not coming up with his own shit. Also, thank you everyone who Booed Eminem after he dissed Moby! I personally don't care about Moby, but anyone who hates Eminem is my ally, and I'm thrilled to death to hear that Eminem was BOOED! Also, just one more personal website update, there was some downtime a few days ago, I don't know how many of you noticed, (I sure did), but that problem is once again fixed. These downtimes are NOT MY FAULT. Remember, back in July this website transferred to a paid-for server, so when the site is down, it's THEIR fuck-up, not mine. I informed them about the downtime (once again), and (once again) they refunded 1 month's worth of hosting fees. So far I ain't paid a fuckin' dime! But it still pisses me off that their server is that unreliable. Anyway, fuck this, you want to hear about the new disses!

The Other Songs section finally sees the song "Exhale" by Vanilla Ice posted. I've been looking for that song for a while and FINALLY found it recently, so now it's on this site. Oh yeah, I was going to post this song before you emailed me, Shorty. So anyway, check that song out. There's also a new song in the "Amateur Songs" section by someone called, "Armenian Rap Minor". I guess it's okay... you know, for an amateur song. Moving down the list, Pictures has about 10 new images you can check out in the 2nd gallery.

I also have some good news again! Your efforts have paid off! 7 more email addresses on the "Shit List" have been eliminated! One of those email addresses was a current "Hate Mail" email address. But there's also 6 new addresses on the list for you to abuse. And, as you would expect, the Hate Mail section has been updated with 8, YES 8 new hate mails & replies! Even BrandiBarbieGirl replied for the 6th time (still no titties). Be sure to screw with their addresses, and thank you in advance for your help. As you might also know, today is the 1st of the month, meaning the Faggot of the Month has been updated with a brand new faggot, Kevin Smothers! Be sure to diss his raciest ass, he's a damned bigot! Once you're done with all of that, head over to the Other Disses section and you'll find lots of new "Comments" and also a new "Interview". By the way, the comment (more like 5-page report) by Yucca Killer is worth checking out if you can spare 10 minutes or more. Like I said, TONS of shit was going to be posted today, so check it out, then tell your friends to check it out & all that shit. Also, for anyone who gives 2 shits about DJ Jake projects or events, head on over to www.djjake.com because I posted a rather legnthy message dealing with DKlan, new music, and current and upcoming projects. That's about all I have to say for now. Have a kick-ass day my fellow Femi-Haytaz. MCL, DJ Jake

For anyone who's been down with this website since day one, you'd realize that today marks day 365 in SlimAnus.com's history. That's right, this website is now 1 fuckin' year old! I'm also proud to say that at this point in time, this website is the strongest and most widely-known it has ever been. What's even better than that, is that it keeps getting bigger & better everyday! Every week, there's more and more hits. And if you think this website is the shit now, then grab onto your balls (or titties), and prepare yourself for the brand new FRESHNESS of the new layout coming to you in this coming month of September! The official date for it to go online remains September 30th... but hey... I might just bring it to you earlier to fuckin' freak all you Femi-Haytaz out! The bottom line is that with the coming of The Wraith, the 1st ICP single, "Crossing Thy Bridge", and this layout soon to drop, these are exciting times for all Juggalos... and all Haytaz. Prepare yourself for flava!

Moving along, in celebration of the 1 year anniversary, I've saved a special gift for all of you Femi-Haytaz! With PHAT props to a Juggalo named Alan, the earliest version of Insane Clown Posse's song "Slim Anus" has now been listed on this website. Simply hit up ICP's Songs section, and find the "Juggalo Show Version" of "Slim Anus". This version was recorded in March of 1999, shortly after Feminem dissed ICP in the Free Press newspaper. If you're familiar with the real and finalized version of "Slim Anus", then you'll easily be able to tell that the "Juggalo Show Version" is simply a prototype, but it's still some funny ass shit. The song came from ICP's "The Juggalo Show" CD disc 3A. Check that shit out!

Lastly, I haven't updated anything else yet. I'll probably put up all the updates right at the end of the month, so when the 1st of September hits, all that shit (and hate mail) you've submitted recently will be posted. Also, if you've written me an email, but no submission attached, I just haven't read your mail yet, so just keep cool and wait. Undesirably, I'm somewhat of a popular person now, so simply wait your turn for the *honor* of my reply... ha ha ha. Yeah, my ass. Shit, I'll just get back to you when I do, ya know? In the meantime, enjoy the "new" ICP song, slap some random Femi-Fan with a 9-Iron, and encourage BrandiBarbieGirl to show me her tits. MCL, DJ Jake

Whuddup my fellow Femi-Haytaz? Once again, new shit has been posted. First I just wanted to define a new word for you people. "Femi-Haytaz" is now the official term for anyone who hates Eminem & is a fan of this website. So if you hate that fake ass bitch Eminem, and you like this website, or have submissions posted on it, you are officially a Femi-Hayta. One step up from that, and you're part of The Army of DEATH, but details on what the hell I'm talking about will not be revealed until the new design for this website goes online at the end of September. I'm telling you, the new shit is fresh. What you see today is ugly as Feminem's used dildos.

Moving on... There's plenty of new Pictures to check out, and also new "Comments", one new "Song Lyric", and 3 new Hate Mails. Once again, one of the new hate mails is from our favorite superficial bitch, Brandi. Enjoy checking those out. Also, some news for all the Femi-Fans that send me hate mail... If you're going to send me hate mail, keep it short. If I see a long ass email, I'm not going to take the time to read it. With long-ass hate mails, I just take the email address, put it on the "Shit List" and delete the message. Simple as that. Your time is wasted. I had to do that to a few hate mails recently, so if you want to hate on me, keep it short.

New shit is posted. There's a good amount of new shit to check out, so stick around if you just got here. First of all, Pictures has been updated with quite a few new pictures. These pictures include some awesome ones produced by "The Humon". Check them out, they're in Gallery 2. I also wanted to casually mention... for those of you who email me questions, be sure to explore this website before asking anything. Sometimes your answer is waiting for you in the FAQs section, and quite often, one of the most overlooked sections of this website, the "Old News". There's all kinds of shit talked about in the archives of postings on this site. If all else fails, THEN email me. With the new design coming soon, there will be a much bigger FAQ section. Which reminds me... For those of you who have asked, I will not check out your website and tell you what I think about it, or help you with it. I have my own website to operate. I also won't sign your guestbook either, that's like sending me an email with your real-mail address and asking to send you an autograph (yes, this has happened before). Autographs are only signed in person. I enjoy checking out fellow Juggalo/Juggalette websites, but don't ask me to help you with it, and don't ask for my opinion on anything. I'm already busy.

Moving on, or moving back to what I was talking about in the first place... new shit has also been posted in the Hate Mail section, including Part 4 in the BrandiBarbieGirl series. I really hope she sends me pictures of her tits... ha ha. But check those out, cuz you'll get a kick out of them as always. "Song Lyrics" was also updated with a few new postings. Concerning the submission of song lyrics... keep in mind I don't post lyrics that haven't been proof-read. Proof-read your shit before sending it to me, or I won't post it. I'll send it back to you and say, "fix it". And don't just send it back to me with like 1 line corrected. In that case, eat a dick, and I'll just trash your shit and you'll never see it on this website. I'm serious.

There's also a slug of new "Comments", including an excellently thought out one by Yucca Killer. When you're done with that, head over to the "Shit List" and abuse the new email addresses recently added to the list. If that gets boring, then head on over to Other Songs where you'll find Necro's "I'm Sick Of You" Eminem diss listed at the bottom of the page. As far as I remember, that just about covers everything that was added. Also, I replied to all emails that I felt needed a reply. If you haven't heard from me, or don't see your submitted shit posted on this website today (reload pages to make sure), then I have no intent to post it. Enjoy the new shit. MCL, DJ Jake

Nothing new has been posted since the 13th, but there's been plenty of submissions. Since I obviously have a life outside this website (unlike Femi-Fans who constantly send Hate Mail), I simply haven't had time to update. But it's the weekend now! Time to have some fun & also update this bitch! So if you've sent something to me recently, expect a reply today... or tomorrow... or whenever I feel like answering it... ha ha. Of course, new shit'll be posted today too at some point. I also wanted to casually mention, for many of you who have asked, no, I do not give out my AIM screen-name or any Instant Messaging screen-name for that matter. Number 2, I'm never on that shit anymore anyway, so it would be pointless to look for me. And I can't make exceptions for anyone either, so don't ask. Just send me an email. Also, as one last piece of news, other than Slim Shitty taking Slim Shits because of his Slim Anus that's been fucked by Slim Penises, the new look for this website is making substantial progress. However, I still don't expect it will be done 'till September 30th. But compared to this current version, the new shit will fuckin' kick your dick off! DJ Jake

Whuddup all? Well, unlike a normal update, there's no new pictures to look at! Who would've thought? Well, there's plenty to make up for that shit. Like once again, new Hate Mail. Actually, there's only 2 since the last posting, but one of my replies is like a fuckin' book-long, but if you're in the mood to be entertained, then check it out. Otherwise, there's some new "Comments" posted as usual, and also some new "Song Lyrics" to check out. There's also a new song in the "Amateur Songs" section, but in addition to that, I got so fuckin' tired of waiting for The Joker's Card website to come back online that I just put the Mp3s of their songs on this website for download. When their website finally comes back online, I'll just link to their Mp3s, but it's just been so fuckin' long since their shit was up, I'm like fuck it, I'll host it myself... for now anyway. So if you ever wanted to hear that shit, then head over to the Other Songs section and hit up the "Amateur" list. And if you want the lyrics to those songs, head back over to "Song Lyrics". Fuckin' complex web of posted shit. Also, here's some awesome news for anyone who abuses the email addresses provided in the "Shit List" or "Hate Mail" sections... 9, yes, NINE more email addresses have been destroyed, including 5 that were in the "Hate Mail" section, which includes that Sublimity bitch. All of your support of spamming their address has forced them to trash their account! Thank you for your support. That's it for today BEEICH! MCL, DJ Jake

If you've been coming back to this website everyday, then you probably already know what's been posted in the last few days, but for those of you who don't, I'll tell ya. There's plenty more "Song Lyrics" added to that section, also some new Pictures. As usual, the "Shit List" continues to grow... DAMN that's a lot of shit listed in that section! Fuck them haytaz! Also, some more "Comments" where added, and by the way, the "Comments" section will be listed as IT'S OWN category in the newer upcoming version of this website, instead of being found in the "Other Disses" section. It just grows too much to have it plainly described as "Other". There's also a new song in the "Amateur Songs" section (in the Other Songs section). So check out all that shit when you get the chance.

One last thing... I just wanted to say this to everybody, especially the HATERS. The haters seem to think that just a handful of people view this website everyday. Those of you who've been long-time fans of this website realize that WAY back in October of 2001, this website was 40 days old, and had 3,000 hits. I look back at that and laugh. I make another 3,000 every 4 fuckin' days! That means that roughly 700 people are viewing this website DAILY, and for approximately half of those viewers, it's their first time. That's right all you bitches in the Hate Mail section, 700 people a DAY have the opportunity to abuse your legally-submitted information. BOOM BITCH! I win & you'z a BEEEEICH! Ain't nobody fuckin' with this site! Anyway, I gotta thank all you Eminem-Haters for your continued support, you all da SHIT! MCL, DJ Jake

It's a new month starting today, and you know what that means? That means there's a brand new Faggot of the Month! I encourage everybody to take the provided emails in that section and sign them up for random SPAM newsletters and whatever other shit you find throughout the web, and if you think it's illegal to do that shit, read my disclaimer in the Contacts section, because the Hater agreed to those terms by submitting Hate Mail to this website. So go ahead and fill up his inbox (no, not his butthole, I know you Feminem-Fans were thinking that).

There are also some new Pictures and "Comments", and a few other random things added to this website. So do your typical browsing & all that shit... if you get bored, just go to the "Shit List" and send some Haters some random shit, or if that doesn't do it for ya, go out looking for cars with Eminem vinyl stickers on them & write a big "F" in front of "Eminem", then take a picture of it so I can post it on this website. Oh shit, I'm not supposed to suggest any illegal shit, I forgot. Well then in that case, it was just a casual thought of inspiration for all of you Eminem-Haters & I take no responsibility for your actions. Yeah, that works.

All those new disses that were submitted since, during, and before the Gathering have finally been posted! There's been some MAD flava added to this website. I'll just tell ya what's changed. First of all, Other Songs contains 2 more songs, Cage - "Illest 4 Letter Word", and Tha Realest & K-9 - "Gangsta'd Out". The 2nd song is only a skit, the rest of the song is not an Eminem diss, so it is not hosted. So check that shit out. Secondly, there's all kinds of new "Song Lyrics", so check those out if you feel like reading shit. Or for you visual people, check out the Pictures section, and you can see nearly 20 new pictures. The first gallery has finally been filled up, so a 2nd gallery is now online. Before leaving this website today, you HAVE to check out the Hate Mail section, and see the 7 new hate mails that were posted. Femi-fans are some stupid-ass shits. You'll get a kick out of reading those. Be sure to sign their email address up for SPAM newsletters & shit too, check my Contacts disclaimer, it's perfectly legal. And if those email addresses aren't enough, there's a whole new slug of addresses for you to abuse in the "Shit List" section. The Faggot of the Month section will be updated on August 1st, so say your last congratulatory remarks to the faggot, Wilbur Lush. Lastly, head over to "Other Disses" and catch up on some new "Interviews". Content-wise, that covers everything that's been posted. So sit back and enjoy the new flava.

If you've been following the news, this website will be changing layouts sometime in the beginning of October... perhaps sooner. A new logo for this website has recently been completed, it's mad fresh, but it won't be released until the new site layout is completed. Production officially starts on the new layout today. The new layout will be twice as fresh as the current one you see. October is the set date... but you never know how soon it might pop up. MCL, DJ Jake

I can now officially say that this website, found both at www.feminem.com and www.slimanus.com have been transferred to the NEW SERVER, and will be online as long as THEY don't fuck up. Yes, there was a period of time when www.slimanus.com was offline recently, but that issue has been addressed, and now both websites are running at 100% capacity. All song downloads in the Other Songs section are working once again... except for the amateur songs by "The Joker's Card"... that's a long story, and it'll be fixed sometime later. But the big news is that everything is now on the new server, so fix your bookmarks & all that shit, cuz this site ain't movin' anymore.

Obviously, there's still a delay in replying to people, but now that the server problem is fixed, you'll see your shit posted or replied to within the next few days. There's still a tick under 100 emails to go through, so just wait. There's gonna be MAD new content when it's all posted, so keep checking back. Tha'z it for now, oh yeah, just a random note... go to the Other Songs section and download "Dasit - Eminem Diss", cuz I just can't get enough of that shit, it's awesome. MCL, DJ Jake

Whuddup Eminem-Haytas? I've gotta drop some bombs about news that should be going down within the coming months. First of all, obviously none of this website's content has been updated since the 17th... no shit, I was at the Gathering. During that time I was either there at the Gathering, hanging out with Juggalos/ettes afterward, or sleeping. So this website just sat here. That's why the shit you've submitted recently isn't on this site yet. There's a whole heap of shit to post, all the way back from July 16th. Your submission will be posted on this website in chronological order, meaning I'll post the old shit first. It'll take a while, so just wait.

Props to anyone who came up to me and gave me props for operating this website. I was surprised that that many people had heard about it. Spread the word! Fuck Feminem & all his Femi-fans! I've got some good news for all you fans... This website will be going under a complete overhaul! No, I ain't upgrading to Flash, fuck Flash. But the new look will be all-around better. Content-wise... it'll be mainly the same, so you won't have to learn how to navigate the site again. But it will look better. The only problem is this... it probably won't be done until the beginning of October, or end of September. Yeah, sure, I could just take the whole fuckin' week off and do it within that time, but contrary to what most Femi-Fans believe, I actually DO have a very busy and active LIFE. This website is just a hobby, I ain't doin' it for the money... shit, what money? So anyway, a new graphically-pleasing website should be coming your way in about 2 months.

On a final note... I know this is a pain in everyone's left testicle, but this website will again be changing servers. Yeah, I know, it's a pain in both of my nuts. But this time, unlike the beginning of July, there shouldn't be any downtime whatsoever. The transition should be instantaneous. One moment you're on Hayta-Server 1, the next you're on Hayta-Server 2. It should be that simple. But if shit falls through like it falls out of Feminem's stretched butthole, then there may be some period of time that the website is down. So that's all for now. When I know more, I'll let you know more. MCL, DJ Jake

Well for those of you who didn't make the Gathering of the Juggalos 2002, I'm gonna give you some review of what happened. First I'll talk about the MC Contest, and how just about every Juggalo wanting to perform got the total BONE! Now, if you saw me perform, you're probably laughing right now, cuz so am I! I ain't gonna deny it, even I thought I sucked while I was up there. But there's some good reasons for that... I was gonna perform on the 1st day, Friday night. BUT, the wrestling thing ran over at least an hour, so the MC Contest was cut all short, THEN, when they started signing up people to perform, they made NO announcement WHERE they were letting people sign up. Me & a bunch of other MCs were waiting on the wrong side of the stage, so that's mad whack. When we finally got to the other side, they were done signing up people. Of course, since they were all short on time anyway, they only let 5 people perform their songs. That took care of day 1... I wanted to go then because I knew I'd lose my voice from the concerts of Dark Lotus and Twiztid & Blaze & ABK. And that's exactly what happened. But anyway, the 2nd day, I finally signed up, but they never called my name, I was gonna go to the evening performance, but then the homo-cops evacuated the whole building because of a so-called "riot". Juggalettes were showin' their more interesting body parts, and the police didn't like it, so they took the girls, but then the Juggalos protested it, and made a blockade and chanted "Let our Juggalos go!". The police started pissing their pants, and they shot pepper-spray paintballs or some crap at everyone. Then everyone had to go outside and wait. It was whack. They still had the concerts that night though, which is when I lost my voice screamin' for Twiztid. I wasn't gonna intentionally NOT cheer for Twiztid for the benefit of my MC Contest performance, SCREW THAT! I'm here to have FUN with some JUGGALOS! So by the 3rd day, my voice was all harsh, and OF COURSE now they finally give me a chance to perform my song, and it sounded ass-scratchy. Actually, everyone said I was good, but if I thought it sucked, then it sucked. *clears throat* damn my voice is still messed up. So anyway, there were lots of Juggalos still unable to perform at the MC Contest, so they got the bone too, along with people like me who lost their voice. It was mad whack. But the bottom line is this... it didn't matter how I performed. This was my 1st performance on stage, ever! So now that I know I ain't chicken-shit & actually DO have the courage to present a performance, there's definite potential with the DJ Jake world. And besides that, who gets it right on the first try anyway? So yeah, I'll admit it, I'm a fuckin' Juggalo SCRUB, AND my performance sounded whack! It doesn't matter what the excuse is! The bottom line is I'll still be bringing the wicked world of DJ Jake to ya'll until my task is complete. Even if I didn't have fans, I'd be bringin' it. And now that I've performed, I can look back, and fix everything that was whack, and next time, it's gonna be mad fresh and devastating. Oh yeah, props to all the ninjas who still said I actually performed good on stage. I actually have no idea how I actually sounded, personally I just thought I didn't do well.

Anyway, the Gathering as a whole was fresh as hell. My favorite part was just chillin' with Juggalos/ettes. Whuddup Ninjas from my Super 8 Hotel! Woop woop! Ya might be Gang Related! Anyway, now I'll just talk about random Gathering events. The Hypnotist Show was BS. "Sleep" my ass. If they have it next year, don't go. The Neden Game was always mad fresh, especially when Madrox showed up. I missed the Juggalette Pageant cuz of the damned MC Contest. The Gong Show was whack, everyone was whack, and for the record, I am as good as the guy who won when it comes to makin' beats with straight up mouth-sounds. The reason I didn't go after he did it was because everyone would think I was copying his act, and I'd get booed and Gonged and sprayed with that ice cold water. But whatever, props to you for winning and thinking of it before me. Next time add some BASS cuz you ain't had that in it. Everything after like 4PM on Saturday was cancelled except the concerts cuz of the pigs. But ICP still did their seminar the next day at 5PM, and holy nuts! It was mad fresh. They revealed the 6th! November 5th, 2002 is the release date for those of you who didn't hear it. And since I don't want 10,000 people emailing me asking what the name of the 6th is, it's called "The Wraith"... Violent J has already said, "Welcome to the Era of the 6th", so in my mind, that means it's okay to let other Juggalo/ettes know what the hell is going on. I do have pictures of the Gathering & the 6th, but I'll have to develop that film first. Then maybe I'll post something. But the 6th looks MAD FRESH, and based on what J said, it'll top everything ICP's ever put out. If you're wondering if ICP is done after the 6th, and come November 5th, 2002, that is the end, you're wrong. J said the 6th comes out in two parts. The 1st is for the Juggalos/ettes. The second is "The Pit" version, released for the world some long-time after November 5th, 2002. That's all the flava I'll give you for now about the 6th.

Well, for those of you who missed the Gathering, you better get your ass to the next one, cuz you missed some awesome crazy wicked shiznit. Oh yeah, F*** BUBBA SPARXXX! He's down with D12 anyway, so screw him. This happened on Sunday, 21st around 8:45PM-ish... Bubba Butt Buffa didn't even show up to the performance at first, which left his DJ on stage and that was all. So the DJ took some heat from a crowd filled with 10,000 angry Juggalos. Whoever threw that water-balloon or cup of water at the DJ, mad props. That exploded all over his equipment. But remember, that DJ was takin' a lot of heat for the 2 butt-lickers that never showed up. Props to him for enduring it. But the 2 assholes who showed up late can eat a dick. I saw Violent J come out on the side, and he looked pissed as hell when Bubba was on stage & every single Juggalo was flippin' him off. J was gonna kill Bubba if he didn't leave right away. So we booed his ass off the stage, and then ICP took over and rocked that bitch! ICP started off with playing a song from the 6th, which was fresh! Deezam, straight up off the hook. There's all kinds of other things that happened at the Gathering, but this covers all of what I wanted to mention.

So anyway, I ain't back from Peoria yet, but tomorrow I will be. Then I gotta settle back into Phoenix & continue the production of new DJ Jake projects, not to mention feminem.com. "DieKill", the master DJ Jake album will be released in 2003. Mad flava is coming your way. DJ Jake

If you're reading this message, it's cuz of 1 of 3 reasons. 1) I (DJ Jake) am traveling to Peoria, IL. 2) I'm AT the Gathering! 3) I'm heading back from the Gathering. So if you got questions or need to talk to me about some shit, then find me at the Gathering. If you're not going, then you'll just have to wait, and miss all the flava of the Gathering. I'll be at the 1st MC Contest on Friday, hopefully performing my song "Juggalo Pride", which every Juggalo will like. Then we'll see what goes down. Jelly Nuts says that the "Juggalo Court" is gonna be off the hook, so be sure to check that shit out. If you wanna find me at the Gathering, it's gonna be hard, but if you head over to www.djjake.com, then you'll find some (vague) pictures of me, so you know what to look for. Bitch, I'm sexy. Ha ha...

Anyway, the Eminem-dissing will continue in my absence. Throughout the month of August, expect some more changes to this website, all for the best. New disses are submitted everyday, so this site is never as it was the day before! So if this is your first time viewing this website, keep comin' back, cuz it keeps growing like the stretch-marks on Eminem's ass. If you ever have a diss to that Femi-faggot, then head over to "Submit Your Diss" and send me that shit! Or, if you're a Femi-fan, and wanna send me Hate Mail, then go to the Contacts section, read the disclaimer, and then mail me your shit so we can all laugh at your superficial stupidity!

That's about as much news as I have to give you. The Gathering is upon us. It's gonna be filled with some awesome flava, and I'll see all you Juggalo/ettes there! Finally we will again be amongst the Family and will be able to BE the Juggalos we are WITHOUT the day-to-day world bullshit! And, at last, the 6th shall be revealed! The world will never be the same. Psychopathic fo-mutha-fuckin'eva! MCL, DJ Jake

(Original post from DJJake.com) If you're reading this message, it's cuz of 1 of 3 reasons. 1) I (DJ Jake) am traveling to Peoria, IL. 2) I'm AT the Gathering! 3) I'm heading back from the Gathering. So if you got questions or need to talk to me about something, then find me at the Gathering. If you're not going, then you'll just have to wait, and miss all the flava of the Gathering. I'll be at the 1st MC Contest on Friday, hopefully performing my song "Juggalo Pride", which every Juggalo will like. Then we'll see what goes down. Jelly Nuts says that the "Juggalo Court" is gonna be off the hook, so be sure to check it out. If you wanna find me at the Gathering, it's gonna be hard, but if you head over to Pictures, then you'll find some (vague) pictures of me, so you know what to look for. Beeeitch, I'm sexy. Ha ha...

The production of DJ Jake songs is obviously on hold at the moment. Once the Gathering is over, production can continue on "DieKill" and the "Mystery Project", both scheduled for release *sometime* in 2003. Expect some more ruthless and dark DJ Jake flava. But also don't expect to hear it, cuz as I said before, the new shiznit's stayin' underground 'till the album drops. The flava in the meantime, can be found in the recently released EP, "Agitated", so head over to Buy Stuff and purchase your copy, it's worth it. Of course orders placed during the Gathering will be stalled, but if you find me at the Gathering, I have extra copies for ya to buy.

That's about as much news as I have to give you. The Gathering is upon us. It's gonna be filled with some awesome flava, and I'll see all you Juggalo/ettes there! Finally we will again be amongst the Family and will be able to BE the Juggalos we are WITHOUT the day-to-day world bullshit! And, at last, the 6th shall be revealed! The world will never be the same. Psychopathic FoEva! MCL, DJ Jake

The submission guidelines for "Song Lyrics" have changed. There's been many lyrics that have been submitted recently where it took FOREVER for me to edit and post your shit. All kinds of shit was mistyped, or there weren't any breaks, or shit was flat out wrong from what the song actually said. So from here on out, all submitted song lyrics must be in the format of the following: 1) They MUST have been through the spell-check. Be sure to make sure the words are spelled correctly. Don't put a "u" in substitution of "you". Spell out the real shit. And if it's slang, make sure I can still understand whatever the fuck it is. 2) The lyrics must have "breaks" after each line. This makes it easier for me to tell when a line ends and the next line begins. 3) Be sure to capitalize the 1st letter of each line, not to mention capitalizing proper names/places such as "Juggalo" and "ICP" and whatever else. 4) Make sure that what you submit is EXACTLY what is in the actual song. If your lyrics don't go through these procedures before submission, then I will NOT post them on this website. I'm not gonna take the time to correct your shit. If they're all nice & ready to go, then I can post it that much quicker.

Anyway, lots of new lyrics can be found in "Song Lyrics". There's a new song by Jermaine Dupri that can be found in the Other Songs section. Of course the "Shit List" has a few new members. And "Comments" has a few more comments & shit. Tha'z all for now BEEICH! 5 Daze till the Gathering!!!

I'm posting this message because an increasing amount of emails from people/bands that want to do a song with me or want me to write their shit. Eventually, I'll have a FAQ section on this site that will constantly answer that question, but for now, NO is my answer. I am SOLO, I write my own music/lyrics & mix it myself & all that by myself. If I did a joint project with someone, I wouldn't be able to take full credit for it, and since I'm a selfish bastard, I want ALL the credit. So no, I do my projects by MYSELF cuz I'm selfish. The only reason other people would appear on a song of mine is if I ASKED THEM. But that'll never happen again 'till after DieKill... possibly. So don't ask me to make a song with you. I know I got mad skills & all that, but I'm solo & selfish & self-centered & evil & not a nice person. I'll admit it, K? Also, no, I will not help you with your music projects, or what equipment you should use, or how I make my music. I had to figure out everything for myself. I did it. You can too. I'm also just too busy, if I helped you, I'd never have time to do new songs for myself. You want new fresh DJ Jake music, right? Then outside of an awesome fan mail from time to time, don't bug me.

Well, DJ Jake is back from his Albuquerque/Chicago appearances. He... I am now in Phoenix, and from here (on the 17th) it's back to Albuquerque, and then to Peoria, Illinois for the GATHERING of the JUGGALOS! That event is going to be awesome. As confirmed earlier, it's only me & Phat Knutz going. Wepeel can suck his bone, and Supah Snickahz got the bone cuz of financial difficulties. But it matters not cuz I'm goin', and I'll have a much better time there than I have had all year. Chillin' with the Family is what makes the Juggalo lifestyle worthwhile.

As for how things went over the break... well... long story. Let's just say it was the most memorable of all breaks to date. Some good stuff happened, but lots of bad things happened too. But that's life, and life isn't made to be good. So it's back to production on DJ Jake projects. Obviously feminem.com was offline for a short while (it's back now). There were some hosting issues that needed to be cleared up, but those issues are in the process of being resolved. That's about it for now. I doubt I'll start production on the new DK stuff until after the Gathering.

It is here mutha fakos! A brand new section has been added to this website. It is a section called "Faggot of the Month". It's dedicated to that one Femi-fan that continues to send hate mail every time he fucks another butt. This month's (July) winner is Wilbur Lush! Congratulations you faggot! Now everybody and their mom should abuse the information listed in the new section. Please abuse his email addresses as you see fit! Ok so why is this section online a few days BEFORE July? Cuz if you've been following the news, I won't be updating this website for just over a week, so I'm putting this section up early. I'll have more on my absence in my next News comment. I would've put the new section online last night along with some other Femi-disses, but I wasn't entirely sober... so I kinda waited 'till today... you know how it is. But who gives a shit, cuz it's here now. I'll see what other new disses I can post today, but if your new shit isn't up by the end of the day, you'll have to wait until early July for them to be posted... and like I said I'll give you more details later. For now, hit up the new section, and fuck with that Wilbur Lush faggot! MCL, DJ Jake

My friends, fellow members of DKlan, random people who happen to read this message, lend me your eyes... or whatever. Just trying to get your attention. My new album EP "Agitated" has dropped, as you well know. You know all about the awesome flava if you've bought your copy. If you haven't purchased it yet, head over to "Buy Stuff" and get it now! There's plenty to talk about, so let's get started with the updated portions of this website.

The sections of Pictures, "Old News", and Buy Stuff have been updated. There's not many new DJ Jake pictures, but it's still updated none the less. Old news just saw some corrections concerning "Trespassing" and a few other mislinked links. "Buy Stuff" has been updated with more detailed information on how to purchase DJ Jake merchandise. With luck, those of you who are interested in purchasing something will find this way a bit less confusing. I've also put up the disclaimer, "All orders and payments received between Thursday, June 27th, and Sunday, July 7th will NOT BE PROCESSED until Monday July 8th. Sorry for the inconvenience, DJ Jake will be away from a computer during these days." This is to tell you that if you're planning on buying something, you should do it like NOW, or you'll have to wait until after July 8th. So what the hell is going on? If you ever read the Appearances section, you'll realize that I'll be in Chicago during those dates. I won't be in places where I'll have access to a computer, so you'll have to wait the 10 days of stale, non-updated websites. But then I'll come back and shit will start to flow again.

At this point, only myself and Phat Knutz will be attending the Gathering of the Juggalos. The 20 hour drive won't be fun, but it'll be worth it. This event is less than a month away! It's gonna be some fresh shit! Can't wait to be amongst Psychopathic Family members again.

Well, now that the EP has dropped, you should know that "DieKill" is the next major DJ Jake bomb. Or is it? There is a Mystery Project ("Upcoming Projects") that is due for release sometime in 2003. What the hell is it? I know what it is. But you won't even have a clue unless you buy the "Agitated" EP, because there's a *hint* somewhere on it... ha ha. So you should know that there's no more major DJ Jake releases planned until 2003. But that doesn't mean I'm taking a break for the rest of the year. Production will continue on DK and MP. However, work will have to wait until after the Gathering. You should also know, I've released most of the Agitated songs on Mp3.com, but that was only for you to sample the flava of DJ Jake. DieKill will remain mysterious until it's coming day. If you're lucky, I might release 1 song between now and the dropping of DK. So when DK drops, you'll have mad new flava, and based on how Agitated sounds, you know that DK is gonna be some seriously awesome shit! Production of new DK songs will resume in mid-July. DieKill will be released *sometime* in 2003.

If you're a return visitor to this website, you'll notice that the menu on the left side of this screen has changed. If it still looks like the old version, reload the page now! The new flava I put in looks a hell-uva lot better than the old brick buttons. If you're using Netscape to view this website, close that damned program, and open something like Internet Explorer, because at least that will view this website correctly! Then you can see the phatness of the new menu. For those who are return visitors to this website, let me know if you like or don't like the new buttons... Contact me if you feel like it. But I don't think you'll have any problems wit'em.

New disses have been added in the following sections: Pictures, Hate Mail, "Comments", and the "Shit List" contains new email addresses of haters! So go fuck with 'em. Hate mail contains a few new emails that are hilarious, check those out. And lastly, I just wanted to say, when you submit a diss, make sure you tell me if you YOURSELF created the diss, or if you took it from someone else! That way, the real creator of the diss won't be pissed when it's posted on this website. MCL, DJ Jake

It is here! The day has arrived! "Agitated" has been released, and is ready for you to purchase from this website! Everything has gone to plan, and the EP is completed on schedule for all of you to hear! It's 41 minutes of awesome DJ Jake flava! There's 8 tracks of the best DJ Jake songs to date on the album. I'd recommend that you BUY your copy today! It's definitely worth the $12 bucks I'm charging for it. It comes with the whole sha-bang... 8 professional DJ Jake songs, and a jewel case that's 100% surrounded with DJ Jake artwork. Everything on the whole freakin' album is done by DJ Jake. Awesome flava!... It even cost quite a bit just to put each EP together! So screw that horrible mainstream Feminem (Femi-fake) music, and immerse yourself in the keepin'-it-real style of DJ Jake.

The pre-release of this album indicated much higher interest than I had anticipated, so extra copies have been made. Get yours today by heading over to the Buy Stuff section, and click on "DJ Jake CDs". I was telling people, "It's 12 bucks," and they're like, "what???"... but then I show the album to them, and play samples for them, and they're literally like, "Hell yeah I'll buy that for 12 bucks!". I'm not bullshittin' either, that's happened for real! But you don't have to believe me, just believe yourself when you listen and receive the flava of DJ Jake. Today is probably the biggest day in DJ Jake release history, so celebrate with buying my new CD.

This website will be updated throughout the day with the new "Agitated" album information. I'll also be deleting a few pages from this website that I don't think really apply to the DJ Jake world anymore, so get your last look. I'll also be attempting to make a Flash splashpage for this website. Only the homepage will be made with Flash, but everything else on this website will not be made with Flash. I really don't like that program. So that's about it... check back tomorrow to see what's up here, and get your copy of the new EP!

(Original post from Feminem.com) It has arrived! My new EP album, "Agitated" has finally been released! This June 15th marks the beginning of the Agitated Era. I'd recommend picking up your copy today, because you're missing out on hellish amounts of flava! The album can be purchased from this website (Buy Stuff), and also www.djjake.com for $12. Check out djjake.com for more detailed information, but I'll just tell you the basics right now...

It's 41 minutes of DJ Jake flava. It's also the biggest release of DJ Jake music up to date. The album is an EP, so it contains 8 tracks, including the Eminem dissing song, The Really Slim Penis. It also includes "Juggalo Pride", which contains a never been heard Eminem diss! "Juggalo Pride" is one of the freshest songs on the album, a must for all Juggalos & Juggalettes to hear. The album is being sold on this website because the album contains Eminem disses. I also didn't expect as much demand for this album as I had anticipated, but extra copies are being produced. I tell people... 12 bucks, and they're like, "What?"... but then I show the album to them, and they sample a few songs, and they're like, "Hell yeah I'll pay 12 bucks for that!". If you don't believe me... fine... whatever, I don't care what you believe, but this album is fresh as hell, and I'd recommend to you all that you purchase your copy from this website.

Moving on, with the release of "Agitated", I just NOW finally got a chance to check my email again, so there's a LOT of disses I'll start posting sometime soon. Just give me a few days (as usual). I've also discovered that SOME of the emails that were sent to me were sent to the wrong email address, an email address that I don't check. I found like 30 emails from fans of this website that I never replied to! Fuck me! So if you're one of those people and you're like, "DJ Jake is a fucking idiot, he never replied to my email." Well then just wait a few more days and I'll get back to you. Sorry for that bullshit fluke, it shouldn't happen again. That account doesn't even exist anymore. So that wraps it all up. Just wait a little bit longer for new fresh disses, and buy my kickass EP! MCL, DJ Jake

You know what has to be one of the most satisfying things? Getting hate mail from the same hayter over and over! All they're doing is proving that they're so pissed about my website, that they feel the need to write me everyday because there's no other way they can get back at me! It's also awesome when they keep saying they get hate-emails from the fans of this website. That's only proving that my "Shit List" scheme is working out so perfectly! And I have a question for you first time haytaz... Why do you feel the need to write 2 hate mails in the same day that are like an hour apart? It's like you expect a reply in that time... or you're so pissed (but intrigued) with this website, that you stay around for more, get pissed again, and write me another hate mail. It's hilarious! I've also had a number of haytaz give up recently! They're like, "I think your site is cool even though I like Eminem, you have a lot of work put into it." But I don't care what change of heart you have, your name stays on the "Shit List" till you trash that account. But hate mail in any form means that this website is fulfilling it's purpose, so please keep sending me your shit, bitch!

Okay... and now for all you non-haytaz... There's just a few news tidbits to discuss. The Pictures section is about to break into it's 4th gallery. After my new EP, "Agitated", drops on June 15th, I'll get working on a different design for that section of the website. Other than Hate Mail and the "Shit List", it's the fastest growing section. Actually there's a bit more in terms of design that I'd like to touch up on this website after June 15th, so one day you'll be surprised.

New Pictures, "Comments", and Hate Mail has been added since the last news update. Someone asked me, "Do you only update your website when you update the recent news?" Hell no! The recent news is just here to keep you updated about what's going on in the world of Feminem dissing. Between news updates I always add more Feminem disses. But usually there's a whole chunk of them added right before I post new news. So if there isn't any new news, that doesn't mean that there's no new disses. Cuz I add what you submit whenever I have the time.

I've also been asked if I'm going to The Gathering of the Juggalos 2002. Hell yeah I'm going. But if you're asking where the hell I'll be while I'm there, I don't have a clue yet. I'm still thinking about all those fresh events that are listed in the events booklet. I just need to pick which ones to go to. You can bet your ass I'll be at one of the MC Contests fo sho! So yeah, I'll be there... and if you're lucky, you down-ass Juggalos may get a chance to meet the master of Feminem dissing, DJ Jake!

On a final note, someone told me that Marz made an ICP diss song. What a fuckin' faggot! I hear they said something like, "only bitches where make up". WTF? Marz did that too when they were down with ICP. So FUCK MARZ! I remember when Marz split from Dark Lotus... I remember Violent J saying something like, "Let's just hope Marz doesn't have to diss us later on..." Well Marz fuckin' stooped down to that bullshit level. All Marz was doing in the first place was trying to get Juggalos as their own fans, remember that? Well now any Juggalo fans they might have had they just lost. Not to mention pissing off all their fans before they were down with Psychopathic... they'll be like, "First you become a traitor and work with the clowns, and now come crawling back to us... FUCK YOU!" So I really don't see what Marz hopes to accomplish besides ending their careers. Course I haven't even heard this supposed diss song yet... I'm sure it's whack though. I should make a website to diss Marz's ass too. I'll call it... www.gayBARZ.com... oh shit! Eminem already registered that name!

Finally done! All that new shit I said was coming is finally here. And if I haven't replied to your emails, or haven't put up your diss yet, then I don't intend to. But I think I posted just about everything that people've sent me. Except for the hate mail. I only reply to them from the Hate Mail section. And speaking of that, it's been updated with 3 new emails! Check 'em out. And of course the "Shit List" has been properly updated, so go hate on those people. Sign 'em up for SPAM newsletters or whatever-the-fuck. I've also added 2 new FAQ's to the FAQ section concerning the absence of Flash from this website, and links to this website. There's also another Miilkbone song in the Other Songs section called, "Presenting Miilkbone". Props to Juggular Anklebiter for hookin' me up. I don't know how many new pictures I put up in the Pictures section, but there were quite a few. One of them is a picture of the Flyer that Eminem used to promote himself (back in the days), and he's using ICP's name to draw people to his show! See? ICP's tellin' the absolute truth. Eminem's just spreading lies. And his legs... for Dr. Gay. "Song Lyrics" has been updated with one new song. And lastly, the "Comments" section has been updated with a few more comments, including comments by Drakazan, who came up with something that anyone else can add on to! It starts off, "You might be Feminem if..." and then there's listed reasons why you might be Feminem. If you want to add to that list, then head over to "Submit Your Diss" and send them to me under "Comments".

On a final note, I'll just keep you updated on the progress of my EP, "Agitated". My new song, "Juggalo Pride" has been completed, and it's the shit. Sorry, I can't give ya a preview of it yet. But the EP comes out on June 15th, so buy yourself a copy when I get it listed on this website. It's 40 minutes of DJ Jake flava. That's it for now. Keep the Eminem Haytin' coming. MCL, DJ Jake

Okay everybody! Gotta tell ya what's takin' so long to update everything. I already mentioned my upcoming song, "Juggalo Pride". If you don't know what I'm talking about, just go to my other website at www.djjake.com. Anyway, I'm working on this new song for my EP that comes out June 15th, and today & yesterday were my days to work on it. So I've basically been doing that and not much else. SlimAnus.com was just kinda set aside. I finally completed the instrumental a few minutes ago, so I can mix in the lyrics tomorrow and I'm set. The song is kickin' ass. And by the way, there IS an Eminem diss in the song! So eventually, I'll post it here for you people to hear. The song isn't one big Eminem diss like The Really Slim Penis is, but it does have an unexpected 20 second diss about 2:20 into the song. I'll let you know more when I know more.

As for all of you people who have submitted disses recently, I'm working on posting them, so just hold on for now. If it ain't up in like a week from today, start bitchin' at me. But, since I couldn't sleep last night, I updated the design issues in Pictures and "Other Disses". You'll notice what I did in "OD", but pictures was a subtle issue... who knows if you'll notice... or care. I care, it's my site and I want it to look good. That's it for now. FUCK EMINEM! WOOOO!

Just a few things to lay down here. Yes, I am going to the Gathering if the Juggalos 2002 if you didn't know. So far I've only gotten Phat Knutz to come with. Nah that definitely wasn't a play on words. Anyway, you can bet your ass I'll be there. I'll have more information about that later. If you want more information then go to www.djjake.com (my other website).

I put up some comments in the "Comments" section that are a reply to what a different Juggalo said. There's not really a place on this website where Juggalos can be interactive, so I'll be a little more lenient with the "Comments" section. As for what I think about the comments that were made... I'll just say this: I have a new song in progress that will be appearing on my new EP called "Agitated", and in the song called "Juggalo Pride" I say, "It doesn't matter how long you been down, if you ain't showin' love then you ain't a Wicked Clown." And for more information on my EP or songs, then go to my other website (listed above).

I also had a request recently to add some interactivity to this website. He wanted opinion sections for viewers that see the various disses on this website. Then you could see what other people think about the diss & how it rates among other disses & all that. I think it's an alright idea if I could guarantee ONLY Feminem-haters viewing this website. I don't like the idea of Femi-fans posting shit on my website without my consent. Now, yes, at some point I'll have to add more interactivity. Right now I don't know how, that's the bottom line... but eventually I'll have places where you can vote for your favorite diss song, picture, maybe I'll even have Eminem dissing contests! But who knows when that mad flava will be around. For now I don't know how to do it, and before there can be that level of interactivity, I need more frequent viewers of this website. Tell your friends! Cuz submitting websites to search engines can be mad expensive.

Lastly, I just wanted to tell you people... You contact me with the Contacts section, okay? You submit a diss by using the "Submit Your Diss" section, okay? If you wanna talk to me, then contact me using the right section, I'll reply faster. And if you're submitting something, use the right category of submission... I received this recently: "Slim Anus ain't nothing but a little bitch, he need's to go suck Dre's dick, and lick his fucken nasty asshole, this is my word's to that little bitch" and it was submitted as an Interview! What? Get it right people. Not that I'm angry or shit, I got mad respect for all Femi-haters, but this website will be updated faster if you submit your shit properly.

Phat Knutz has confirmed that he's goin' to the Gathering of the Juggalos 2002. So now it's me & him goin'. He wasn't sure until I mentioned the MC contest to him. Now he's all about goin'. Okay so what am I talking about? The Gathering of the Juggalos happens in Peoria, Illinois this July. It's a 3-day event where Juggalos everywhere come together for... well this time it's ICP's new album and 6th Joker's Card. So I gotta be there knowin' the Juggalo I is. There's also this MC contest at the Gathering where upcoming music artists have a chance to perform 1 song in front of fellow Juggalos. If you're voted Phat, you make it to round 2, and if you win that, you get to produce an EP under Psychopathic Records! Holy Balls! So yeah, I gotta try out. I just had to make some details about that clear today.

The production of "Juggalo Pride" is on schedule. I have a fake instrumental and performed lyrics done. Next weekend I'll work on that 'till it's done. Then "Agitated" is nearly finished, and you can soon buy your copy! And by the way, I won't be putting "JP" on "Mp3.com" after it's finished. Maybe I'll put it up AFTER the Gathering, but I wanna save the flava for y'all until the Gathering. I really doubt I'll win anything from performing "JP", so after the Gathering, I'll still have a new EP out, and I'll have some time for those new Video Game remixes I've been talking about!

And finally, I fixed the mislinked Mp3 samples and animations on this website. After obtaining more hosting space, I shuffled around some files, so links got lost. Now it should be working once again. Contact me if you find somethin' that's not working. I'm also going to take down the "Lyrics" section of this website soon. If you want lyrics, just listen to the song. If you can't understand it, tough. I don't want people stealin' my shit.

Two of the artists in the Other Songs categories have been updated because the information I had listed was wrong. Propz to 2K for keepin' me updated. "Miilkbone" and "Fuck Dre" have been updated with pictures and different information. I'm still looking for a full version of the "Miilkbone" song though. Hook me up if you got it. The FAQs section has also been updated with a new question about my assistance with your websites.

I also gotta say THANK YOU JELLYNUTS and NETMASTER GORDON for your excellent service to the Juggalo community. I emailed JellyNuts today, and like 5 minutes later he replied! Holy fuck! That's fuckin' awesome that Psychopathic is constantly busting ass for each & every Juggalo. I've also submitted a few questions for "Axe the Question" on ICP's website. Who knows if they'll be posted. One of the questions does concern this website. I'll tell ya if it gets posted, but you'll probably see it before I do.

First off, I'd like to say a big FUCK YOU to all the Eminem fans out there that try to fuck with Juggalos! Actually... this whole website is a big "FUCK YOU" to all Eminem fans, so I guess there's really no need. But fuck you anyway. Ha ha ha. Ok let's get down to business.

I got a lot to talk about. Stick around if you got 5 minutes to spare. It's odd... this site's already been back online for quite a while now, but I've already gotten stranger emails than I ever did back last year when the site was up. I've gotten fan mail from Eminem fans, and I've gotten hate mail from a Juggalette. Ha ha ha WTF? It's some pretty crazy shiznit. Actually, it makes sence. The Juggalette was sayin' the site was offencive cuz it dissed fags. Hey let me get one thing straight: I HATE fags. The thought of 2 GUYS doin' the nasty shit is just the worst thing ever invented (next to Eminem). But you need to read that sentence again... 2 GUYS. I got no problem with 2 GIRLS doin' their shit. Go ahead, lesbians is the shiznit. All girls are bisexual anyway, so it makes little difference what I think. So I just wanted to get that straight... no pun intended.

There's also been some confusion about the reason why this site was created. Some people seem to think that I maintain this site because I hate Eminem for being a hateful person. What? Shit, I'm a hateful person. I hate Eminem cuz he fucked with the FAMILY. By family I mean Psychopathic Family. I'm a Juggalo - a fan of ICP for life! Eminem dissed ICP. My retaliation is this website, and my song The Really Slim Penis. Fuck Feminem! If you fuck with the Family, we're not gonna take that shit! I know there's a lot of Juggalos that wanna make a website like this, but don't know how. Since I know how, I do this to represent all the Juggalos that hate that gay Femibitch. I've got Clown Love yo! Psychopathic Foeva! I'm devoted for life. Psychopathic is my calling. All other Juggalettes and Juggalos are Family. I'm down with all of 'em. I'm here to represent'chall.

There's actually been a lack of submitted Eminem disses recently. But I've still posted a few new things. There's also been a severe drop in the amount of Hate Mail I've been getting... I think Femifans are finally getting the point that if you send me shit, I post it and we abuse the shit out of your Email address. That's life yo. If you're stupid enough to submit it, then you bare the responsibility of our Hate. It doesn't matter to me, either way, I win. I have this website, I already won. You can't do shit about it! Don't even try! I'll have this website till 70 years after I die! You Eminem fans can't do shit about it. This site is 100% legal. Defaming a public figure as big as Eminem is okay in every book. So if any of you other people out there are afraid of gettin' tagged by the law cuz of something you submit, don't worry about shit yo! I'll take care of it.

Ok, here's something for you Eminem fans. I think that even you people would agree with me that Eminem is a fucking RAT BASTARD for being involved with Napster's shutdown. Eminem has also gotten enough money already... he doesn't need any more. So I recommend that you get your ass over to www.Kazaa.com, and install that program and download all the songs from Em's new album, "The Gay Bitch Show"... I mean... or whatever it's called. But this way, you don't pay him shit, and you still get his shit. Be illegal! He fucked with Napster! What an ass! And if you Juggalos need to hear his new shit so you can rewrite lyrics for this site (or whatever), then just download his songs using Kazaa. Eminem's new album comes out June 4th... I think. Hopefully you Eminem haytaz out there will come up with some new disses related to the Feminem Show.

I guess this is the last note. My new EP called "Agitated" will be released on June 15th, 2002. It's got some mad fresh songs on it. I'll also have a new song completed called, "Juggalo Pride". That song MAY contain an Eminem diss or two... I don't know yet, but it's gonna be fresher than hell. If you want some more information about that, then head over to www.djjake.com.

It has finally been done! I came up with a name to represent the flava featured on my first EP. And that name is, "Agitated". Back last year it was gonna be "Killing Spree", but that song was never completed with Supah Snickahz, so I just let the name slide. So this time, it's got it's name, and it's stickin' to it. "Agitated" also has a release date, June 15th, 2002. That's a Saturday. I'll be in Albuquerque & droppin' the new DJ Jake bombs. The EP is mad fresh already, and I'm not even done producing it yet! I've still got 1 more song to make, and then it can be finished off. I've also changed the track listing on you people, (but this is a good thing) now there's 1 more track!!! You didn't think I'd put an intro did ya? Well I did, and though it's only like 1 minute long, it's also mad fresh shit to bump. It ties into the rest of the EP every well. So the total number of tracks is 8, and that includes the unreleased songs, "Intermission", "Bitch Nuts", "I Deserve Better", "Juggalo Pride", "Humpty Bump", and the "Intro". Oooo! Did I just let another bomb slip? Yup! The final song to complete is called, "Juggalo Pride". That song's gonna be mad fresh as well.

I'm still looking for ways to get to the Juggalo Gathering in July. Wepeel crapped out on me. Who knows what bit him in the ass. Phat Knuts and Supah Snickahz still might be going. They better be. Shiznit... everything in the last 2 months has been building to the Gathering event. My EP, the websites, everything has been in preparation for the Gathering. Don't let me down guys! Don't you hear the call? The call of the 6th? I hear it loud and clear. I'll go it alone if needs be. There's this thing at the Gathering where upcoming Juggalo music artists can present one of their songs! The winner gets to produce an EP under Psychopathic Records! Phat as hell yo! You can bet your ass I'm gonna try for it if I'm there. That's why "Juggalo Pride" is so important. I'll be presenting that song. But as for any more details about that song, I'm keepin' it under wraps for now.

On a final note, "Humpty Bump" is finally listed on Mp3.com. You can hear it, or wait for "Agitated" to drop or whatever you prefer. I just wanna say something about this song. I never even knew that there was a song called, "Humpty Hump" before finishing my song "Humpty Bump". That's really crappy bullshit. Now you probably think that I copied that "Humpty Hump" BS. My butt! I came up with everything on "HB" by myself with no prior knowledge of "HH". That sucked when someone told me about that "HH" crap. Whatever. "Humpty Bump" will NOT be appearing on "DieKill". It's an EP exclusive. You'll only find it on "Agitated". It's good, but it's not DK. Anyway, I've updated the necessary sections of this website, (like "Upcoming Projects" and Songs) with the new "Agitated" information. Check it.

I recently submitted a request to ICP's website, www.insaneclownposse.com, that this website be added to their "links" section. I have no idea if it's gonna be accepted. But if it does, that would be the best thing to ever happen to this website! Just think of how many more Juggalos and Juggalettes would be exposed to a place where they can submit their disses! This site would grow exponentially! If it is accepted, I don't know how long before it will be up and running in their "links" section. Could take weeks... I have no clue, I've never done this before. We can just hope for the best!

The design issues I've talked about are nearing completion. The only sections that remain to fix are the Pictures (each picture) section, the Buy Stuff section, and everything in the "Other Disses" section (except animations, that's already done). But still no word about the hosting of some of those Other Songs. I put back on Milkbone, and one of the Esham songs for download. As soon as I strike this deal that'll get me lots of free Megabytes of hosting space, then all the songs will be downloadable. For now... just wait. And one last thing, to all the Femi-fans that have been wanting replies to Emails, look at the Contacts section and READ WHAT I FUCKING SAY! I do not reply to hate mail! If you say something worthy of a response, I put it up in the Hate Mail section, with my reply that disses the shit out of you! Then all the Jugglos and Juggalettes can abuse your Email address in the "Shit List", until you're forced to trash it because you can't handle all the Haytin'!

Everyday I've been puttin' something new up on this website. You probably don't notice it if you check back every day. But all this is adding up. I finally added like 90% of the Eminem disses that were submitted last December before this website was taken offline for a little while. There's new Pictures, new "Song Lyrics", new "Interviews", new Hate Mail, and a bigger "Shit List". I also finally listed Esham in the Other Songs section. Some song downloads don't work yet. Next weekend, all the downloads should work again. Like I said, it's a gradual process. One day (probably later this month) I'll just be like, "fuck! I'm done! now what?". With my luck I'll've probably created a new design for the site that kicks this one's ass. Nah. Once it's done then I'ma keep this for a while. Anyway, I've also divided the "Other Songs" section up into 2 sections. I made a category for "Professional Songs" and one for "Amateur Songs". So if you don't wanna bother listening to the shitty sounding stuff, then you don't have to visit the Amateur page. I've also updated that section of this website with the new layout. "ICP's Songs" will look like that eventually too. And the Pictures section outgrew it's 2nd Gallery, so now there's 3! There's some sick shit at the end of #2 if you wanna check that out. Just keep comin' back and submittin' shit to me. This isn't one of those idle websites where you have to come back next month to see if anything changed. Everyday I've been addin' or changin' shit around.

I have officially been up nearly 40 hours straight without sleep. My college's all about final midterm projects this week so I got screwed. However, they're finally done, and guess what? I go to check out DJP's OverClocked website, and there's my new Wizards & Warriors I remix chillin' on his "recent" submissions list. So it's like... alright I wanna go to bed, but I'm just gonna stay up and update my websites. I hate non-updated sites when big news is going on. So yeeah! DJ Jake is all up in dis biznitch again.

DJ Pretzel's commentary about my remix wasn't too favorable, but I didn't expect him to like it that much. I stepped out on a limb and tried some new composition techniques. I like it... it's not something I'd skip listening to if it were on a CD, but it's also not something I'd fast forward to hear it sooner. But of the 3 current remixes, this one is still the best.

And DJ Pretzel is wrong by the way... I never said my next remix wouldn't be W&W. In fact my 2nd remix was from Super Mario Bros III, and it's called the "Sound Effects Mix", which DJP listened to himself, but rejected cuz it didn't fit his remixing requirements. So he just plainly forgot. But hey... with like 2 million hits over on his site... I dont' blame him. Actually I agree with just about everything he's said about my remixes so far. So anyway, that's the news. DJ Pretzel is officially hosting my 3rd Game Theme remix, "It's Knighttime" remixed from "Wizards & Warriors I". Check that shiznit out yo!

You probabally noticed that this website wasn't accessable last night & a stupid little screen came up saying I exceeded my bandwith. Well that pissed me off, so I have located a different place to host both my websites. I just finished fixing the linking problems a few minutes ago. Everything should work fine again. If you find a link that doesn't work, just Contact me so I can fix it. I also had to take 2 songs offline in the Other Songs section. Right now I am using a chunk of my hosting space to help out Sakura... when I'm done I'll link the 2 songs properly.

Yesterday I also finished making the first official Slim Anus poster! You can see a bigger size in the Pictures section and you can purchase it in the Buy Stuff section. I's not a big poster... but it's still 17"x11". Great for any Feminem hater! Also, since this website just recently has gone back online, I'd appreciate any comments about it's functionality & whatever. Just hit me up an Email.

Now that everything's uploaded, DJ Jake is officially back up in dis biznitch! You're probably wondering what the nuts happened to him these last few months. Well... nothing much. I just wanted a break from maintaining 2 websites. But now I'm unemployed, so I got mad amounts of time to work on 'em again. I don't see any reason why www.djjake.com and www.slimanus.com would ever go offline again. I'm back, and back to stay.

There's actually quite a bit to talk about. I haven't written or performed a song since "I Deserve Better". The "Killing Spree" EP was officially canceled, so I really didn't feel like working on anything. I did develop an urge to remix old video game music. If I'm not listening to something Psychopathic has put out on CD, you can bet I've got one of the Various Nintendo Themes CDs playing in my stereo. On April 6th of this month I completed my 3rd Nintendo Theme remix. I called it, "It's Knighttime", and it was remixed from a theme in the NES game Wizards & Warriors I. It is by far my best remix yet. It only took approximately 3 days of work before it was completed. Since it was, I focused on rescripting Slim Anus, now that that's done, the focus is once again DJ Jake.

Skipping back, my new remix is from the same game that I first remixed. That make any sense? Back in April of 2001, I did my first remix, and it was also from Wizards & Warriors I. So now the count is 2 remixes from Wizards & Warriors I and one from Super Mario Bros III. But that's all for WWI for a long time. The Super Mario Bros III remix is entirely make up of sound effects from that particular video game. DJ Pretzel over at OverClocked ReMix wouldn't accept it however. It wasn't a "remix" by his standards, but I agree with him. Perhaps I'll have a link for you to download it soon. It's short, catchy, and fun. Be on the lookout for it.

When "It's Knighttime" was completed, I also started work on Various Nintendo Themes #4, the next Nintendo compilation CD. It was completed a week later. The CD contains 36 tracks of NES music from such games as "Gauntlet", "Castlevania", "Megaman III", "Arkanoid", "Wizards & Warriors II & III", "Spy Hunter", and "Super Mario Bros III". And of course I put some secret tracks on it, including a half-song I did in 3 hours called "Humpty Bump". There's more secret tracks too... but I won't spoil the surprise. VNT4 isn't my favorite of the VNT series, but it still is awesome to listen to.

I have submitted "It's Knighttime" to DJ Pretzel's OverClocked ReMix website, but so far no response. I wouldn't expect one for another few weeks. His website is awesome, and I'm pretty sure that he's the only one scripting it. Meanwhile, I convinced Sakura to finally submit some of his Nintendo remixes to OC ReMix... he has about 20 more remixes that I do! So for now I'm hosting 3 of his remixes for DJ Pretzel to download. With luck, you should see them on OverClocked sometime in early May.

Ok enough of the Nintendo music stuff. What about new DJ Jake stuff? Right now, nothing has been started, but once this website is fully operational, you can bet that the new DJ Jake EP will be my first priority. I won't give away any details yet though, it's bad luck. I just plan to have it ready to release by late June, hopefully before The Gathering of the Juggalos. Probably next weekend I'll start work on 1 or 2 more songs.

I've been trying to convince Phat Knuts, Wepeel, and Supah Snickahz to go with me to the Gathering of the Juggalos, and for a while they all seemed down for it. Now some shit's come up, and it doesn't look like any of them can make it. Damn it! I am going no matter what. Actually right now it looks like it will be me and Supah Snickahz going. If Wepeel doesn't go, Phat Knuts probably won't either. Whatever. I've tried too hard to get them to go, and I'm sick of waiting for their confirmation. It'll be FUN, come on! Screw work, screw any other plans, how often does the 6th come out??? I guess we'll see what happens as we near July.

Off the top of my head, that's about it. There's actually a few more things to talk about, but why bore you with this long ass essay? Which reminds me... in conclusion, DJ Jake is back, and is here to stay!

I woke up this morning for work, and as usual I sat down with my bowl of cereal & checked out ICP's website. Then I'm like BAM! Yo! That's my shit they're sportin' on their page! I doubted I'd ever win any of the Juggalo Weekly Challenges, and suddenly I'm all up in the bitch. The week's contest was to design a vehicle that would take you to the Gathering of the Juggalos 2002. I hit on the idea of what I had known about the 6th Joker's Card and came up with my idea. I know it's got somethin' to do with mirrors and ravens, so I made a flying-driving raven vehicle. I originally wanted guns & weapons & all kinds of shit on it, but I didn't have enough time so I kept it more basic. However, I'd still like to ride this to the Gathering with my DK Bruthaz. I shoulda called it the "Raven's Ryde"... with a "Y" cuz of Rydas (you know). Whatever though. It was good enough to win & now I get some kind of free signed merchandise which kicks wicked ass. There's a bigger picture of it at ICP's website found "Here."

The finalized version of this DJ Jake compilation CD has finally been completed! I don't know how many hours I spent on this project, but the quality of the whole shebang was worth it. And the music kicks ass! 24 tracks of some of my favorite Nintendo Theme Remixes. See... if you haven't noticed by now, I only put CDs together for ME. Music I like, I don't care what the rest of the world wants on the CD, I make it for myself. And if people besides me happen to like it, kool.

"The Great Nintendo Remixes Volume 1" is easily the most creative of the Nintendo CDs I've made so far. The jewel case is covered with artwork. It's got artwork all over the front, back, spines, inside, on the CD, behind the CD... everywhere I could put something. It's just awesome. And that's a good reason why it's expensive for you to Buy. It takes a lot of printing & cutting & ink to make one of these.

This CD contains 24 tracks, two of which are my own remixes. McVaffe is my favorite remixer of the whole bunch. If you're a fan of NES music, you'll want a copy of this for sure. Inside the case is artwork suggesting that there might be more volumes to come sometime down the road... Fo Sho. This is just the first slug of remixes that I like. And of course I have plans to spit out a few more.

One third of the tracks are remixes from "Super Mario Bros"... you might have heard of it. Well anyway, I made sure to put some secret tracks such as a MIDI and an NES cover of a Korn song on the CD. Not to mention a commercial for Various Nintendo Themes #4, due this summer. Then there's an extra special & funny ICP thing at the end. So there you have it! Check it out.

Happy Birthday to Phat Knutz! Well... yesterday anyway. But I'm still older than he is. Anyway, I have FINALLY learned how to do rollovers with Java... damn that was simple! Just like Director. Just never make me use Flash again cuz that program was a nightmare. The bottom line is that now this website can finally begin the major construction. The main menu to the left already has all it's rollovers and the disappearing tabs are being worked on. It seemed like this website was making slow progress, but now finally it has a chance.

For some other REAL news for once, a short Nintendo Remix I did I sent to DJ Pretzel over at Overclocked, but it still hasn't been posted, I sent it like 4 weeks ago. So either he doesn't like it, or he hasn't gotten to it, or he likes it but it doesn't fit his "remix" requirements. Whuteva. I like it, and I put it on the recently completed (prototype) "The Great Nintendo Remixes" CD. My other NES Remix of Wizards & Warriors is also on this CD. This CD kicks some serious ass, so I suggest you buy one from me... well... when I get the "Buy Stuff" section online.

The picture above is a postcard I sent to Phat Knuts, Wepeel and Supah Snickahz. Actually in order it's Supah Snickahz, DJ Jake, Wepeel, and Phat Knutz. This picture was taken right before we headed to see the Hatchet Rising Tour in Albuquerque, NM, October 2001. The postcard was for a class, might as well apply that Juggalo flavor to it.

Lastly... Life is still sucking a massive bone here in Phoenix. Somehow I'm still here and alive though. If I do decide to ever make more music again then it won't be until after March - that's for sure. Cuz then I'll quit that bullshit job. I also gotta ask this girl out, and when... well that's none of your business.

And so it begins... My original intentions were to destroy both www.djjake.com and www.slimanus.com to cut off some of my stress. As of now, both websites have been offline for one month. But now as chance would have it, the classes I'm taking at my college require me to go through more web-scripting cources... so I might as well rebuild www.djjake.com even better than it was before. I always wanted to know how to do rollovers with Java & what not. So as this class continues on, these webpages will continue to become more and more complex, until it is finally done, and then I can host it with the new (and horrible) Cox Internet service.

That was the other problem... @Home went out of business. Through them I had 70MB of Webspace that I could use freely... well no extra cost becides the $40/month for Cable Internet "service". But their company went to hell, and in the in-between months from the switch from @Home to Cox it was pointless to maintain a website that would soon be destroyed. So I just said screw it, and destroyed it myself. Now we'll have to see what happens...